At Moe's Tavern, Lenny, Carl, Barney, and a couple of other regulars all

puff on cigars being handed out by Homer.



   Moe: [sniffing a cigar] Ah, this place is going to smell classy all

        week.

Barney: To Homer, the Wall Street genius!

         [everyone claps as Homer bows]

         [Homer lights a cigar with a $1, then puts out the flame and

        puts it back in his wallet]

 Lenny: Hey, Homer!  How come you've got money to burn?  Or singe,

        anyway?

  Carl: Yeah, Homer, what's your secret investment?

 Homer: Take a guess.

Barney: Uh, pumpkins?

 Homer: [pause] Yeah, that's right, Barney.  This year, I invested in

        pumpkins.  They've been going up the whole month of October and

        I got a feeling they're going to peak right around January.

        Then, bang!  That's when I'll cash in.

Barney: To Homer, and to Sergeant Pepper, who's growing out of the

        middle of your back.

   Moe: Uh, Barn, you gotta unwrap the plastic before you smoke those.

-- Moe, carcinogen expert, "Homer vs. Patty and Selma"



Everyone toasts Homer as the camera pans to a jack-o'-lantern.  Not long

after, the pumpkin is a rotted pile.



Broker: Homer, you knuckle-beak, I told you a hundred times: you've got

        to sell your pumpkin futures before Hallowe'en!  Before!

 Homer: All right, let's not panic: I'll make the money back by selling

        one of my livers.  I can get by with one.