|
How Do I Get Her Back?
|
View this Thread in Original format
| DJ Sunburn |
So I've been in a relationship for a year now with a girl I love more than anything.
We've been through our ups and downs, but we've had so many good moments that just couldn't ever be replaced.
She's the type of girl that never leaned too much on other people. Just me. She loved the attention I gave her, and love. She never liked girls very much, because of the numerous amount of backstabs they have done to her. So she focused more on guy friends.
Two weeks ago she decided she wanted some space so I gave it to her. She didn't have anybody else she was really interested in. She just wanted to boot old habits we had in our relationship (talking on the phone too much) etc...
But a few days later, she met a guy named Ben. She allowed him to come over to her house and stuff and they chilled. Of course, I didn't like this very much.
Ben is head over heals for Christina. Which is odd considering they just met. He tells her he loves her, gives her flowers, cards, and roses. He takes her places. He's real nice.
BUT HE JUST MET HER! And looking through his online journal, it's easy to say that he's this way with every girl he friggin meets!
There's another guy that takes her home in the afternoon from school. His name's Michael. Every day they hang out after school.
Christina used to be all over me and adored me all the time. But this change in her happened so fast where it seems like she just doesn't care anymore. She's got this new freedom.
And she's the type of person that would get mad if I hung out with other girls.
I miss her terribly. She's always hanging out with her new friends, and I want my relationship back with her! She used to be the most loving person towards me. And now she tells me about how she enjoys cuddling with her new guy friends and such and its just a slap in the face to me. argh....
This is not her at all! I don't see how she could hurt me like this!
What do I do? I want her back!!! |
|
|
| netw3rkd |
you gotta show ben whos in charge, you
try kicking his ass or something :] |
|
|
| whiskers |
| quote: | Originally posted by DJ Sunburn
She never liked girls very much, because of the numerous amount of backstabs they have done to her. |
well, mate, i think she turned out to be one of those girls she hated herself and you have been backstabbed. it's a pity.
of course, you can't do much, IMO. she's free to do what she wishes and you can't stop her. of course you could try talking to her, talking some sense into her, but i'm not sure that would work...
but you should try because you said she has no girl friends and if something happens (say Ben turns out to be a real ), she'll have no shoulder to cry on - girls tend to need that kind of thing. then she might do something stupid.... |
|
|
| GelatinPufF |
| quote: | Originally posted by DJ Sunburn
And now she tells me about how she enjoys cuddling with her new guy friends and such and its just a slap in the face to me. argh....
This is not her at all! I don't see how she could hurt me like this!
|
It seems to me like she's trying to get back at you for something you carefully avoided in your little story :o |
|
|
| politicsofdancin |
sorry to hear that she left you to be a new person..i don't know how old this girl is but looks like she want to move on and have some changes in her life....maybe she wasn't content with your relationship..and like you said this ben guy is giving her lot's of attention. sad to say, but guys do that in the beginning...they put on there "o, i'am a great guy mask" and takes it off in the long run...ffs...
anyways...if she said that she wants her space, let her have it..and if it's really meant to be for her to get back with you ...it will happen...just don't be up her ass and beg coz that would be too pathetic....there is nobody in this world worth someones pleading...IMO...i guess i'am just bitter now lol
good luck hun
indy |
|
|
| DJ Sunburn |
| quote: | Originally posted by GelatinPufF
It seems to me like she's trying to get back at you for something you carefully avoided in your little story :o |
Actually. There isn't anything that I've done.
I was always a good guy to her. Never hurt her or anything. I don't see why she's like this. |
|
|
| Creamfields23 |
I think you gave her her selfesteem back. This because you treated her like a real guy. And now she's totally happy with herself again she tried to move on.
And believe me once a girl says she needs time off it means 99% of 100% she's gone. For you you can't blame yourself. You did what you had to do. And if she decides to move on just be happy that she did it now. The sooner or later it would have happened.
Advice: stay who you are and don't force her with calling and stuff I she doesn't comeback on her own, she wasn't worth it.
And remember it's saturday today. WOOOOT
Cheers! |
|
|
| MrSquirrel |
When you say school do you mean high school?
If so don't get yourself all worked up over this. Just find something to occupy your time and the pain will subside. If you continue to obsess about getting her back it will end up causing you more harm than good. I know from experience.
There are many fish in the toiletbowl of love.
If you are obsessive about getting her back it will probably freak her out and drive her away.
MrS |
|
|
| wienerschnitzel |
| quote: | Originally posted by politicsofdancin
sad to say, but guys do that in the beginning...they put on there "o, i'am a great guy mask" and takes it off in the long run...ffs...
|
for some guys THAT IS SOO TRUE... a few times this has happened to me and i get showered with romance and cheesy and then after 3 weeks they turn into complete psychos! ladies, watch out for these guys... and guys watch out for those girls for that matter.
anyhow
Maybe your relationship was a bit overwhelming for her, and she needed to move on and start new ones or maybe she is just being a bitch. it sounds like you are rather screwed, and i mean this in the nicest way. I have been in your situation a few times when i was in highschool and i tryed EVERYTHING to change it but it just seemed the effort i made, made it worse! So even though it really sucks, i think you just have to sit back and re-evaluate the situation yourself, and maybe cuddle with some girls to let her have a taste of her own medicine. |
|
|
| GelatinPufF |
| quote: | Originally posted by DJ Sunburn
Actually. There isn't anything that I've done.
I was always a good guy to her. Never hurt her or anything. I don't see why she's like this. |
Just because she hasn't told you you've hurt her doesn't mean you havn't :stongue: that's the in problem with girls :whip: they never tell you what's wrong :whip:
:whip: |
|
|
| DigiNut |
| quote: | Originally posted by DJ Sunburn
...
What do I do? |
Nothing. Absolutely nothing. Don't call her, don't talk to her, don't even act like she exists.
Give her her "space", like Indy so aptly put it, which is what all girls think they want but really can't stand for more than a week.
Cut her out, and give it a week or two. If she ends up going hardcore with the new guy, then you're far better off without her anyway. If she comes crawling back, then you've got a choice, either tell her to off and get your vengeance, or lay down the law before you say "ok".
Just remember, there is nothing, yes NOTHING you can do to lower her interest in the other guys. However, I'm guessing that if the other dude is constantly sending her flowers and telling her he loves her, her interest in him will die out very fast - in fact, I'd go so far as to say she's just using him even now.
It bears repeating, don't make any moves and if she makes a move, don't let her get you involved in any mushy or emotion-related or relationship-related discussions for the next little while. Just make up an excuse and say you've gotta go when that starts. If she really 'loves' you, she'll realize how much she hates you being "inaccessible" and will come crawling back in no time. If she doesn't care about you, she'll take off, and that's of no loss to you anyway in that situation. Oh, and if you can, it wouldn't hurt to go out with a few other girls (preferably hotter than she is), and make sure she knows about it. You don't want the g/f to think she can do whatever the f*ck she wants with you because you 'need' her.
Trust me, if she has any interest in this other guy, his constant sucking-up will make it fizzle out soon enough. The worst thing you can do is be on her tail throughout the process, because that will make her associate it with you ("you messed it up with my friends") rather than the absence of you ("holy this guy is lame, what happened to my b/f anyway?")
Oh and one other thing: don't listen to relationship advice from women. Trust me on this. |
|
|
|
|
