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Funniest thing I've ever heard from a homeless person
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| Essential1 |
I was walking down the streets of downtown toronto last night, and this homeless guy came up to me. he said "I have no money, I wanna get drunk & I don't like fat chicks."
I was laughing so hard I gave him $5 |
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| montie |
haha thats great
id rather a homeless person tell me he needs alcohol or drug money than making up some stupid bull story about how they are trying to get a job or are really hungry.
if one came up to me and was like "yo man you got any extra change i need to go buy a 40 so i can get faced" i'd be happy to buy him a 40 and one for my self and chill with the dude for a bit. |
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| tranceDJ |
The homeless dogs need help too... |
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| Perfect_Cheezit |
When i was in California last, i saw some high school kid screaming at this bum.
"DONT YOU EVER F*CKING TOUCH ME! YOU EVER F*CKING TOUCH ME AGAIN ILL F*CKING KILL YOU YOU PIECE OF SH*T"
bum - "i don' kno' wha' cho' talkin' bout..."
*CRACK*
the kid punches the bum square in the face, the bum flies backwards and hits his head against a pole, and passes out. The bum apparently tried to take the kids wallet. |
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| Essential1 |
| quote: | Originally posted by montie
haha thats great
id rather a homeless person tell me he needs alcohol or drug money than making up some stupid bull story about how they are trying to get a job or are really hungry.
if one came up to me and was like "yo man you got any extra change i need to go buy a 40 so i can get faced" i'd be happy to buy him a 40 and one for my self and chill with the dude for a bit. |
haha that's what i'm saying...had no time to chill though, i had to get to the club for the $2 drinks |
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| Essential1 |
| quote: | Originally posted by FunkySimon
Once I was eating a sandwich and this homeless guy comes up to me and says: can I have your sandwich
I said: no man i'm hungry:stongue: |
LMAO!!! That's hilarious! |
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| Boomer187 |
I've noticed very different kinds of money begging. The other day a guy asked for one quarter, I had like 5 but gave him one. Then I saw him go up to the next guy and ask for one quarter....wierd strategy but it worked apparently.
I've had detroit bums ask for much more, food, gas, dollars, crack, meth. kinda fun. |
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| mmilo |
| quote: | Originally posted by FunkySimon
Once I was eating a sandwich and this homeless guy comes up to me and says: can I have your sandwich
I said: no man i'm hungry:stongue: |
hahahahha ..
yea once a homeless guy came up to me, with a joint in his mouth (hell i think he was blit already) and asked to play and sing a song for change...... =p too bad i had to catch my bus |
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| dartman |
| quote: | Originally posted by montie
haha thats great
id rather a homeless person tell me he needs alcohol or drug money than making up some stupid bull story about how they are trying to get a job or are really hungry.
if one came up to me and was like "yo man you got any extra change i need to go buy a 40 so i can get faced" i'd be happy to buy him a 40 and one for my self and chill with the dude for a bit. |
thats what i'm talking about. instead of pre-game'n at the house, i'm gonna grab some 40s and find a bum to chill with. i bet they have some prettty wild stories to tell too, it might actually be fun |
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| dj2kTA |
I was in Chicago last Christmas and this fat homeless lady asked if I had any change and I said 'no'. We really had absolutely no money on me at all. So she proceeded to start yelling at me to take my gifts back goddamnit this, fvck that, etc. etc. She was going nuts on me and my gf as we were walking by. I wanted to punch her in her fat fvckin face after that. And then we saw her yellin at two other guys when we were across the street.
Thats my story :) |
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| montie |
| quote: | Originally posted by dartman
thats what i'm talking about. instead of pre-game'n at the house, i'm gonna grab some 40s and find a bum to chill with. i bet they have some prettty wild stories to tell too, it might actually be fun |
hell yeha they do. one nite i was chilling with some friends on santa monica beach drinking and a bum comes up to us. aparently he was hiding from some peeps he had just got into a fight with because they were hanging out in his sleeping spot. we ended up talking to this guy, Charles, for 3 hours. He told us stories on his trips up to San Francisco, about his dog, about being in Jail, about the gay guys who have sex in the lifeguard towers late at nite all this crazy stuff. it was awsome.
ooh also
i remember my friend telling me about these bums up in San Fran, called wood bums. They dress up in camo gear and decorate them selves with sticks and leaves and hide in bushes along the street. When someone walks by they jump out of the bush screaming scaring the out of the people passing by then hold out their hands and kindly ask for money. |
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| BTG |
i was walking down town toronto, and there was this bum going on about how theres too much of the white devil in office. or somthing, and he's like vote 'my name' for mayor. :D
he sounded pretty angry at white people. |
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