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Sex yet still just friends - possible? (pg. 4)
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| jdjd |
the problem is most of the time the girl was willing to sleep with the guy because she had feelings for him, but she didnt know or didnt want to let him know...
i think it really depends on the girl... if she has no desire for a relationship, and the guy probably doesn't hehe, then why wouldnt it work? |
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| DigiNut |
| quote: | Originally posted by jdjd
...if she has no desire for a relationship, and the guy probably doesn't hehe, then why wouldnt it work? |
*sigh*
It would work, it just wouldn't be called a friendship. This whole "Friends with benefits" thing is a crock. It's simply a case of two people who aren't seriously attracted to each other having sex because it's the best they can do at the time. "FwB" is basically a sugar coating for that so it can be put out in the open.
If this weren't the case, then why would you say the same two people immediately stop having sex when one of them finds a boyfriend/girlfriend? |
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| TrAnCeAkI |
| on mtv they gonna have a show called TRUE LIFE " friends with benefits" lol u should watch :P |
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| DigiNut |
Fortunately, we don't get MTV here.
Oh, er... I mean unfortunately, of course... |
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| speedracer_mec |
| more like being each others hoes...if u ask me |
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| jdjd |
| quote: | Originally posted by DJ_NRG
Reminds me of a joke I heard once:
What's the difference between "making love" and "ing"?
Making love is what the girl's doing while you're ing her :D:toothless |
lol
no ing is making love properly |
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| Kirk |
| quote: | Originally posted by TheatreBaby
It can be done...but both parties have to be ready to handle it. Its not always easy. But fun as . My best friend and I did it. We always knew we'd be bests friends, so we figured it would be fun. He's the guy i feel most comfortable around which means we tried so much stuff that i prolly wouldn't have tried with another guy, cause i woulda been to nervous. We just stoped having sex recently, and we are still best friends. We can sleep in the same bed and not wanna . Or we can sleep in the same bed and . It just depends on our moods. I think its an awesome experience. But not every one can handle it. But in my case it made us closer! |
Same situation with me. But only for a while, do u think u can handle the thought of your partner sleeping with someone else, because thats what its all gonna come down to in the end..knowing it was just sex, i started getting jealous 'n' the more i thought about it. And it justs gone down hill from there,now we barely speak. Bassicaly it totally ed things up between us:( |
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| agni_gr |
Well it happened to me and it wasn't that bad. It's been 4 years that me and my best friend were very close. We were always making jokes about sex and stuff, we even slept in the bed several times, but it NEVER came to our minds that it would be possible for us to have sex for real. Until last summer, when one night we were both very drunk (it's always the booze!!) and we decided to sleep at my house, like we did many times. I started to tell him stories about how I had sex with someone and when I came to juicy details he told me he was "high'. So I thought I'll do something for my best friend and help him with his problem..! It took us very little time, then we slept like babies. The day after we talked about it very seriously and we decided to act like nothing happened. I felt like I had sex with my brother and he felt like he had sex with his sister. It was a very bad feeling for both of us. We never talked about it again and now it's forgotten somehow. I belive nothing changed between us and we still feel the same for each other. However, I think that if we continued having sex some more times, thing might be different.
So, it depends on many many things to say if friends should have sex or not. In my opinion, if the friendship is good, better not take the risk. After all, if you feel so horny...go mastrubate...! |
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| Sand Leaper |
| quote: | Originally posted by DigiNut
Sand Leaper: again, this entire question revolves around playing semantics with the word "friends." IMO, when people do the nasty, they aren't just friends anymore. |
This is where the entire crux of the matter lies. The reason you say this is because you think that sex is something profound and with great significance, and thus you think that the act of sex between two individuals always makes their relationship more than "friends". As I already stated however, the significance of sex varies extremely from one person to another, and that is why many people can still stay friends even after sex. Just look at this thread.
| quote: | | If you're on someone's "just friends" list, it means they're not attracted to you and you're never going to score. If they're screwing you and claim that you two are "just friends", what it really means is, I'll take what I can get for now, but I really think I can do better (i.e. hotter/richer/better in bed). Sorry, but that's the harsh reality. |
That's a very harsh generalization, and altho probably true in many cases, this thread has proven that there are indeed exceptions. So you should be careful of judging the entire issue on your perception of the matter. |
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| Ezman |
I been in the same boat, was really close with my best friend for like 6 months before it happened. She really liked me during all that time (she wanted to go out and ) but I said 'no' so shes like 'lets just be friends then', it was all good.
Except I didnt know she was hiding feelings for the WHOLE time. Anyway, she finally revealed it to me and I said there was a tiny spark there on my behlaf too (not that much though), then we started talking about it.
So me being male, having some feelings as well as being able to talk to her about anything and everything for hours, and her being fairly attractive, we kinda "organised" it.
We did it once that time, then 4 more times after (she lived like 2 hours drive away, then we kinda thought that was enough and she wanted to move on (it was much more to her than it was to me, I kinda felt guilty about that but then again im a guy).
A year later and we are still best friends, and in the last year shes slept in my bad at least like 15-20 times and nothing has happened, she has a bf and i respect him and get along with him so its all good.
But yeah things WERE a tad messy when i wasn't sure whether i really loved her or not and thats my story, so I'd say it does work but it might be a bumpy road! |
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| TranceGeek |
| quote: | Originally posted by Kirk
Same situation with me. But only for a while, do u think u can handle the thought of your partner sleeping with someone else, because thats what its all gonna come down to in the end..knowing it was just sex, i started getting jealous 'n' the more i thought about it. And it justs gone down hill from there,now we barely speak. Bassicaly it totally ed things up between us:( |
thats because you started thinking of her as your "partner"...
:) |
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| astroboy |
| quote: | Originally posted by DigiNut
*sigh*
It would work, it just wouldn't be called a friendship. This whole "Friends with benefits" thing is a crock. It's simply a case of two people who aren't seriously attracted to each other having sex because it's the best they can do at the time. |
That's what I thought the common definition of "Friends with benefits" was. You have a friend... they're good as a friend, they may even be physically attractive, but you're not interested in pursuing a long-term relationship wit them, and you don't love them.... but cos neither of you can find a special someone, you screw out of convenience. It's totally selfish sex... not communicative at all, one step above masturbation really. |
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