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If you started dating someone, would you care about their past? (pg. 3)
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| Floorfiller |
please tell me which of these ladies are men and which aren't?
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| PVD & T[]C |
| they're all guys... im assuming |
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| Seventil |
| quote: | Originally posted by Floorfiller
please tell me which of these ladies are men and which aren't?
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I know one is Jason... but who are the others? |
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| spec |
| quote: | Originally posted by Floorfiller
please tell me which of these ladies are men and which aren't?
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Um, unless you live your life in a box I'm pretty sure that you will get more personal information meeting someone and looking to date them, than looking at some done up photo like that.
FGS, there are much better things to be paranoid about than that.
A little touch with reality please people! |
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| idoru |
| Going with Spec's original post, it's always nice to know a bit about who you're dating. Gives you an idea of what kind of a person she is, etc. |
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| spec |
| quote: | Originally posted by PVD & T[]C
not really. i mean, say somebody got raped and beaten, or was a drug addict and lived on the streets, but they're trying to turn their life around. some people dont want the poeple that they start relationships to know things like that. and its not wrong or immature to be interested in a persons past. it gives you a good understanding of their life and their personality.
think of it this way (sorry there isnt a better example, but you get the picture.) a girl and her mom are best friends and her mom dies some trajic death. a year later you meet a girl at a club and as you get to know her you find out she likes jokes a lot. you pull out a "your mom" joke and she flips out, smacks you and runs out crying. at that point you would realize that you should have learned of her past as best as possible. crappy example, but it gets the point across... |
Yeah, but would you hold this against a person?
Generally people that are worried about someone's past is looking to judge them in some way. |
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| beats and beeps |
| WTF, what kind of an idiot wouldnt care about their past? They could be a murderer, or a man, or something. |
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| Floorfiller |
| quote: | Originally posted by beats and beeps
WTF, what kind of an idiot wouldnt care about their past? |
spec |
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| beats and beeps |
| quote: | Originally posted by Floorfiller
spec |
ehhh...i guess beggers cant be choosers. |
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| PVD & T[]C |
| quote: | Originally posted by spec
Yeah, but would you hold this against a person?
Generally people that are worried about someone's past is looking to judge them in some way. |
it completely depends. its not like i would shun them from my life, but its good to know who they were and are.
when it comes to judging them, thats just called intelligence. guys know that we would only talk to the type of girl that fits our needs physically, because thats how guys work. its after they meet and during a conversation that they learn of who the person really is and whether they would want to carry on a relationship with them. now you could go off and start dating someone and be completely oblivious as to what their past was like, but thats stupidity. any woman in their right mind would wnat to know what kind of guy they are dating, and in turn, guys would too. by judging them, you are simply deciding whether they fit your sexual needs, and by finding out their past, you can decide if this is the type of girl you want to be with. the first impression isnt all that matters. the past is equally important because thats what determines who she as a person is, and whether that person is the person for you.
if she was extremely sexually active, you would probably want her to get tested. if she is high maitenence, but you're broke, you probably wanna turn and run. do you get me yet? |
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| butterfly |
i like to know about their past because it is very helpful to understand how they came to be the people they are now, which is important to be able to learn what the best methods of communication are...
but even though i want to know about the past doesnt mean i will hold it against them. what matters is who they are now. |
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| Lira |
yes, and I've always kept in mind that if I ever found something hard to deal with in a person, I'd better not to do it myself. For example: I would be really really disturbed if my girlfriend had joined a moresome. Really, imagine the person you love being banged up and down by 3 blokes with 20cm poles stuffing all her holes. And I declined the chance of getting in a threesome with lesbians for the same reason.
No "outside pleasure" (i.e. sex and drugs) beats the "inside pleasure" (i.e. happiness and love)... although you may manage to combine them depending on who you are and who you fancy.
| quote: | Originally posted by butterfly
i like to know about their past because it is very helpful to understand how they came to be the people they are now, which is important to be able to learn what the best methods of communication are...
but even though i want to know about the past doesnt mean i will hold it against them. what matters is who they are now. |
Exactly - you can really learn a lot from knowing the person's past, which only improves communication.
But sincerely: "how many people have you slept with", this would just be a way to know how important sex is to the person - if (s)he's slept with many people, then maybe she doesn't always link it to love... if you do, you either need to re-adapt yourself to the new reality or the relationship wouldn't go nowhere, as you would mind about it a lot more than her; "what sort things have you got up to", is a good way to know how the person deals with the world; "what did you do that for" is a good way to know how the person thinks (or thought); "whens the last time you had sex", kay, so that's a bit odd. |
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