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You gotta love yourself before you can love someone else ... explanation?
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| Magnetonium |
I am just curious, realationships have been evasive to me, and as a heterosexual curious being, totally clueless and nervous when it comes to relationships (to be honest, I never had one :o :o :o ), so I am wondering if someone can explain me / fill me in on this term.
"You gotta love yourself before you can love someone else."
Thanks! :D |
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| kamil |
| quote: | Originally posted by Magnetonium
"You gotta love yourself before you can love someone else."
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Its bull, seriously, youll find someone eventually that accepts you for who you are. Anyone that ever tells this ing is an idiot and has problems of their own. |
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| Magnetonium |
The way I see it, this term means
you have to become selfish and ungiving in to people, to make sure that other people wont take advantage of you or explose your weaknesses ... and you have to be strong mentally, and happy, proud about yourself ... am I right?
The question is: what the hell kind of a person is that? WHY IS THIS SO IMPORTANT? I heard many people say this to me when I talked to them about success in realionships ... :crazy: |
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| DigiNut |
It means you have to have your own identity, your own interests, your own life, and your own source of happiness before you can get involved in any long-term relationship. If your "significant other" is your only source of stimulation (physically AND intellectually), you end up being a needy, possessive, clingy nuisance that drives them away after a few hours - days, if you're lucky.
And for god's sake, whacking off doesn't count. |
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| tatgirl |
| Well, if several people have told you this, it means that they could be sensing a general down-on-yourself self image coming from you. You gotta sort your problems and insecurities out b4 u start searching for someone else. Any sign of weakness is an immediate turnoff for many (unfortunate as that is). THere also has to be a bit of a chase on both ends. If u go to the table as an open book, or willing to give everything from the beginning, it looks too 'desperate'. A bit of emotional distance works to your advantage. |
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| drgoodvibe |
| quote: | Originally posted by DigiNut
It means you have to have your own identity, your own interests, your own life, and your own source of happiness before you can get involved in any long-term relationship. If your "significant other" is your only source of stimulation (physically AND intellectually), you end up being a needy, possessive, clingy nuisance that drives them away after a few hours - days, if you're lucky.
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that's about right.. hrmmm.. |
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| StereoPrincess |
| the saying is "you have to love yourself before someone else can love you". |
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| Sly_Guy |
'loving myself' sounds a bit too egocentric.
Lets just say I have a mutual respect between myself, and...uh...myself.
Seriously, if you can't stand yourself, you should be in therapy, and not trying to go out on dates. |
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| Allegory |
Wow, for the first time pretty much everyone is on the same page, so there you have it, these people just handed you the answers :D
Just a thought, those who "love themselves" are usually comfortable with being independent and with themselves, and won't do things that makes them uncomfortable to appease others. It can be quite tricky, and even those of us who feel comfortable in their own skin face insecurities. We'd be like the vogons if we didn't- without the bad poetry ;) |
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| nycionx |
| quote: | Originally posted by StereoPrincess
the saying is "you have to love yourself before someone else can love you". |
now that makes more sense. i guess he meant to write that?:conf: |
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| VERTiG0 |
| quote: | Originally posted by DigiNut
If your "significant other" is your only source of stimulation (physically AND intellectually), you end up being a needy, possessive, clingy nuisance that drives them away after a few hours - days, if you're lucky.
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My last girlfriend fit this description perfectly. Glad I got rid of her.
The way I see it is that you've gotta have confidence. Be sure of yourself, and the day is yours. |
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| DigiNut |
| quote: | Originally posted by StereoPrincess
the saying is "you have to love yourself before someone else can love you". |
No it isn't. Although it probably would make more sense that way, but a lot of clichés are back-asswards. I think you're confusing that with other similar sayings like "If you can't look after yourself, no one else will". |
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