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A joke (pg. 7)
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| quote: | Originally posted by gwrmarines
A husband and wife are having sex upstairs with the window open when a bumblebee flies in the window and into the wife’s vagina. The man and the woman freak out and decide to go to the emergency room. When they finally get to see a doctor, he says that his plan is to put honey on the tip of his penis, to start having sex with the woman, and then to attract the bee and pull out his penis along with the bee.
After a minute the husband and wife agree to the plan. The doctor starts having sex with the wife. At first the mood is still calm, but after a couple of minutes the doctor starts groping the wife’s breasts. She starts moaning and screaming along with the doctor. The husband yells, "Wait a minute! What the hell do you think you are doing doctor?" and the doctor replies, "change of plan buddy, I’m gonna drown this son of a bitch" |
this story is false |
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| ZeJayMan |
Stevie Wonder is getting interviewed on radio
Presenter:
"It must have been awful, born blind, growing up in a bad part of town, you had a poor family, your dad left when you were just a toddler. Life was really tough for you, yet you struggled through it and became a world famous musician. Could things have been any worse for you?"
Stevie Wonder "Yeah, I could be black" |
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| mezzir |
whats pink and red and sits in the corner shrinking?
a baby with a potato peeler
:haha:
for some reason thats always been my favorite dead baby joke
whats the saddest part about four black guys driving a cadillac over a cliff?
they were my friends :( |
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| lücid |
| quote: | Originally posted by mezzir
whats the saddest part about four black guys driving a cadillac over a cliff?
they were my friends :( |
i lol'd. :haha: reminds me of one of my favorite jokes...
what do you call a black man who flies an airplane for a living?
a pilot, you in' racist!
:p |
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| gwrmarines |
| Hello, and welcome to the Psychiatric Hotline.If you are obsessive-compulsive, please press 1 repeatedly. If you are co-dependent, please ask someone to press 2. If you have multiple personalities, please press 3, 4, 5 and 6. If you are paranoid-delusional... |
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| gwrmarines |
Why are seagulls called seagulls?
Because if they flew over the bay, they'd be called bagels! |
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| mezzir |
| quote: | Originally posted by lücid
i lol'd. :haha: reminds me of one of my favorite jokes...
what do you call a black man who flies an airplane for a living?
a pilot, you in' racist!
:p |
aw man a while back there was a HUUUUGE thread of jokes like the one i told
the whole point was take a well known joke and replace the punchline with something that makes literal sense
i can't remember if it was in the humor forums here or on something awful
ing hilarious either way though |
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| gwrmarines |
Q. If you are an AMERICAN when you go into the bathroom and you are an AMERICAN when you come out of the bathroom....What are you WHILE you are in the bathroom?
A. EUROPEAN... of course! |
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| gwrmarines |
Hear about the psychic midget who escaped from jail? Yeah the headlines in the newspaper read "SMALL MEDIUM AT LARGE".
What's the last thing to go through a bug's mind as it hits the windsheild?... His ass!
A Jewish man walks into a bar and sits down. He has a few drinks, then he sees a chinese man and punches him in the face. "Owch!" the chinese man says. "What was that for?" "That was for Pearl Harbor," the Jewish man says. "But I'm Chinese!" "Chinese, Japanese, what's the difference?" And the jewish man sits back down. Then, the chinese man walks up to the Jewish man and punches him in the face. "Ouch!" the Jewish man says. "What was that for?" "That was for the Titanic," the chinese man says. "But that was an iceberg!" "Ice berg, Goldberg, what's the difference?"
Do you know what a Jewish dilemma is?
Free ham. |
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| eye_03 |
whats the worst part about licking bald ??
pulling the diaper up before the mother comes in.
:wtf: :wtf: :wtf: |
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| arcadia190 |
| quote: | Originally posted by eye_03
whats the worst part about licking bald ??
pulling the diaper up before the mother comes in.
:wtf: :wtf: :wtf: |
what's with the baby jokes?. u guys think they r funny? |
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| Slylee |
| quote: | Originally posted by cmay119
Why do I keep laughing at these jokes? I almost spit my pop out reading this one. |
+1 :stongue:
here, i posted this in the metric system thread yesterday....still a favorite. lol
| quote: | Originally posted by Slylee
haha that reminds me of a funny joke. hope you dont take offense if you really are black, but it's too funny not to post.
anyway...3 third graders are out at recess. one kid is a jew, one is italian, and the other kid is black.
so the jew kid is like, "hey, let's compare penis size, i'll go first"
so they agree, and the jew kid whips his out. the italian kid looks at it and goes, "pshh, that's nothin, look at mine". he whips his out and it's much bigger.
so then they look at the black kid and say, "ok your turn" and he whips it out.
the 2 other kids go, "WOW! yours is huge!" it is by far the biggest.
so later on that night, the black kid is at the dinner table with his mother and she says, "how was school today honey?" and the black kid says, "oh it was alright. my friends and i compared penis sizes today at school, and i had the biggest one. my friends said it's because i'm black"
and his mother says, "no dear....it's because you're 23"
:stongue: |
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