If anyone at the office says the word 'synergy', I will ram their starbucks insulating mug up their ass.
The Highroller
quote:
Originally posted by devnull
contingency i hate that word! overused.
Especially after completing Org. Behavior, Org. Theory, Leadership courses!
One word that is overused to the point of making me want to gouge my eyes out in accounting is the word "reasonable". The instructors at my school seem to think that heraing it as often as we do in a proper context is no enough, so they've decided to start redundantly throwing it into random sentences.
Example of correct usage: "Based on historical default trends, we can reasonably estimate allowance for doubtful accounts for 2008 to be 2%."
Example of incorrect usage that I herad last week: "Since Mrs. Smith told us that she wants to maximize profits, we reasonably know that she will be biased in her selection of accounting policies."
El K Dee
quote:
Originally posted by Abercrombie
If anyone at the office says the word 'synergy', I will ram their starbucks insulating mug up their ass.
El K Dee
quote:
Originally posted by The Highroller
Example of incorrect usage that I herad last week: "Since Mrs. Smith told us that she wants to maximize profits, we reasonably know that she will be biased in her selection of accounting policies."
ugh..."reasonable cause to believe" replaced with "reasonably know"
thats just taking a short cut and ing things up
PivotTechno
quote:
Originally posted by Jer
For all intents & purposes. ;)
Durrr, thanks for the lesson, poindexter.
Smart people would use the correct phrasing, but that isn't what this thread is about, da? Why do you think I put it in quotes?
Bruce: I came as soon as I ascertained you needed to see me, sir.
Dave: Sit down, Williams.
Bruce: [sits] What is it, sir?
Dave: There have been some complaints about your use of language on the docks.
Bruce: If this is about yesterday, sir, yes I did use a few blue words, a few cuss words, but as soon as I ascertained that the mix up had been corrected --
Dave: Noo, Williams, it's not your swearing that I'm getting complaints about; it's the fact that use the word "ascertain" too much.
Bruce: Really?
Dave: Yes, apparently you use it an average of two to three- hundred times, daily.
Bruce: Well, I do, but so...other...few words...fit.
Dave: Well, it's driving the men crazy.
Bruce: Who's complaining, sir? Is it Sanchez?
Dave: Noo, it's not Sanchez. It's--it's the older men, the ones nearing retirement.
Bruce: Sir, I ascertain that these men are just jealous of my command of the...English...uh language.
Dave: Well, perhaps. But, I suggest just to keep things running smoothly down at the docks that you humor me by limiting yourself to these four work-related phrases: [reads them off a paper] Good morning fellas; Hand me that thing; Boy, this work's hard; Guys, break's over.
Bruce: Sir, I ascertain--
Dave: Ah.
Bruce: -- that it's their problem. They're just jealous of me. It's my right to ascertain things. You should talk to them about their being upset about my...ascertaination.
Dave: Look, I was young once; and, whatever you do in the privacy of your home, with your good lady wife, well that's your business. But, when it starts to slow work down on the docks, then it becomes my business.
Bruce: I ascertain--
Dave: If you don't back off that word, you'll be looking for a new job -- comprendez-vous?
Bruce: I...asc--
Dave: Unh-uh.
Bruce: ah--
Dave: Mmm-mm.
Bruce: ah--
Dave: Nn-nn.
Bruce: Asc--
Dave: N-nuh-no.
Bruce: Asc -- asc--
Dave: Nooo-no-no-no.
Bruce: I asc--
Dave: Mm-mm-mm-mm.
Bruce: Cer--
Dave: No.
Bruce: tuh--
Dave: Uh-uh. Good morning fellas; hand me that thing; boy, this work's hard; guys, break's over.
Bruce: I asc--
[Dave shoves the paper in his face. Bruce grabs it with disgust.]
Bruce: [pouting] Boy, this work's hard.
Dave: There ya go! Good boy! Now, get the hell out of my office.
[Bruce gets up to go.]
Dave: Glad we had the chance to delineate our little problem.
[Twinkley music sounds out the word "delineate" dances around the screen.]
Bruce: [to himself, trying the word out] Duh-lynn-e-ate. Duh-lynn-e-ate. Sir, I promise I'll never use that...other word ever again. [to himself] Duh-lynn-e-ate.
[Dave eyes him skeptically, as Bruce continues trying the word.]
evil_cookie
^^LOL
Skipper
quote:
Originally posted by Dr. Z
-leveredge (heard this one too many times, used completely wrong, not even remotely close)
lol.
Goddamn that leveredge word and people using it to try and sound smart.
Skipper
quote:
Originally posted by Abercrombie
If anyone at the office says the word 'synergy', I will ram their starbucks insulating mug up their ass.
Your office is really bad for that, if I recall correctly.
Zentac_75
quote:
Originally posted by El K Dee
actually quote is both a verb and a noun depending on context
"to quote"
"a quote"
nope, 'a quote' is informal
crabby english teacher humiliated me a decade ago so I remeber it well.:whip:
kotsy
quote:
Originally posted by Zentac_75
Check your PM
DigiNut
Jesus, I could write a book about people who like to think outside the box and leverage collective synergy to formulate key objectives into a coherent win-win game plan to improve their core competencies and complete key initiatives. But I digress.
Specifically, I think the worst ones are:
Infer - usually because the person saying it actually means imply. God I hate that so much.
Envision - how about "imagine", "picture", or just "see".
Optics - because "image" is a dirty word now.
Value proposition - the "proposition" adds nothing.
Develop - considering that this title is often (erroneously) applied to my work, maybe I shouldn't talk, but most of the time when people say this they actually mean either make or improve, which are not quite the same things.
Utilize - 'nuff said. Although there is a legitimate use for this word (when something is being used for an unexpected or unintended purpose).
Management and investment types are bad for this, but I think the worst offenders are in HR. I seriously can't listen to them, they make me want to claw my own eyes out so I can plug my ears with them.
