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Mormon mother "abuses" child, gets ridiculed by entire world (pg. 10)
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| EgosXII |
| quote: | Originally posted by wienerschnitzel
Seeing as i am the only one (i know of) that is speaking from direct experience of raising a kid, i agree with what jenny is saying. |
:haha: definitely
congratulations :)
why do you think some kids are messed up then? is it because they're hit, or is it because of more than that? |
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| MrJiveBoJingles |
Kids turn out the way they do mostly because of genetics. Bad apples beget more bad apples, and good ones beget the opposite.
[/big wet blanket] |
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| EddieZilker |
| quote: | Originally posted by EgosXII
why do you think some kids are messed up then? is it because they're hit, or is it because of more than that? |
There are SOOOOoooo many things that can mess up kids that answering the first question is nearly impossible. |
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| EddieZilker |
| quote: | Originally posted by MrJiveBoJingles
Kids turn out the way they do mostly because of genetics. Bad apples beget more bad apples, and good ones beget the opposite.
[/big wet blanket] |
NO! You've got it all wrong. It's the sins of the father. Genetics is a hoax.
READ THE BIBLE!!! It's in there. |
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| EgosXII |
| quote: | Originally posted by Miss Pie
Of course there's good and bad parenting, lol. |
are you just trolling me now? where is the line jenny? what is parenting measured by? Good and bad implies a guideline, so who created that? please, please answer these questions.
| quote: | Originally posted by EddieZilker
There are SOOOOoooo many things that can mess up kids that answering the first question is nearly impossible. |
that's pretty much the point :p |
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| wienerschnitzel |
| quote: | Originally posted by EgosXII
:haha: definitely
congratulations :)
why do you think some kids are messed up then? is it because they're hit, or is it because of more than that? |
i do believe that some kids are just full of piss and vinegar, and even the perfect parenting wouldn't change that, on that note, i don't think corporal punishment would either.
from what i've seen with neibours, friends etc. is INCONSISTENCY. I often hear like "DON'T DO THAT OR YOU'LL HAVE A TIME OUT" *kid does it again, proceeds to look at parent for reaction* parent repeats *I'M SERIOUS DON'T DO THAT AGAIN OR YOU'LL HAVE A TIME OUT" etc. Basically alot of empty threats, so the kid will always call your bluff. Also i think kids do things to get attention whether it's positive or negative attention, so if they have siblings that are close in age, and the parent is frustrated multi-tasking and trying to manage them, the parent will get lazy and over look alot of things or continue with empty threats and hope they'll work. This is why i decided to wait a few years before having another kid. I spent alot of time with my first, and now i spend alot of time with my second. Since my 4 year old is old enough to understand babies need alot of work, she doesn't take it so personal, and she helps out.
To be honest, i didn't even watch the video, i can only imagine what it was by reading what people said. I am interested to see what challenges my son will provide as a kid, since boys seem more abrasive. (totally speculating here..) but i am confident i will never hit or beat or with my kids heads, that i will find an alternative that is just as or more effective. |
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| Silky Johnson |
Parenting is measured by the outcomes of the child. A well-behaved, well-adjusted child with a high sense of self-esteem who respects his or herself and others is usually a strong indicator of good parenting.
An ill-behaved, poorly adjusted child with low self-esteem who respects neither his or herself or others is usually a strong indicator of bad parenting.
You're telling me that you can't tell the difference between a good and bad parent? |
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| EgosXII |
| quote: | Originally posted by wienerschnitzel
i do believe that some kids are just full of piss and vinegar, and even the perfect parenting wouldn't change that, on that note, i don't think corporal punishment would either.
from what i've seen with neibours, friends etc. is INCONSISTENCY. I often hear like "DON'T DO THAT OR YOU'LL HAVE A TIME OUT" *kid does it again, proceeds to look at parent for reaction* parent repeats *I'M SERIOUS DON'T DO THAT AGAIN OR YOU'LL HAVE A TIME OUT" etc. Basically alot of empty threats, so the kid will always call your bluff. Also i think kids do things to get attention whether it's positive or negative attention, so if they have siblings that are close in age, and the parent is frustrated multi-tasking and trying to manage them, the parent will get lazy and over look alot of things or continue with empty threats and hope they'll work. This is why i decided to wait a few years before having another kid. I spent alot of time with my first, and now i spend alot of time with my second. Since my 4 year old is old enough to understand babies need alot of work, she doesn't take it so personal, and she helps out.
To be honest, i didn't even watch the video, i can only imagine what it was by reading what people said. I am interested to see what challenges my son will provide as a kid, since boys seem more abrasive. (totally speculating here..) but i am confident i will never hit or beat or with my kids heads, that i will find an alternative that is just as or more effective. |
your examples of friends is pretty much exactly what i was trying to say, in my exagerrated, incomprehensible manner:
it is completely understandable that parents can't (and as i said shouldn't really) control every move their kid makes. I was trying to say, if a parent is incapable of COMPLETELY institutionalising the type of punishment jenny said is good, then the kids are going to have no sense of respect, and no respect for authority in particular... If you give them a light hit (again, i'm not saying belt them etc), but give them a clear punishment they cannot fail to understand, is it altogether bad?
its better than the parent who creates a monster because they're physically or mentally unable to carry out the intense liberal punishment method--
sounds like you have really cool kids, and have a really good idea, and ability to get through to them, and its great you don't have to hit them, or use physical punishments, but i don't think its necessarily a bad thing, for kids who fail to adhere to the lighter side of the law |
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| EddieZilker |
| quote: | Originally posted by EgosXII
that's pretty much the point :p |
If I'm understanding you correctly, you're trying to make the case for spanking by saying that it doesn't necessarily constitute other forms of neglect or maltreatment and should therefor be excluded as a cause for harm.
Which is kind of like saying that garlic kept in olive oil isn't the only condition in which anaerobic botulism reproduces and it should therefore be excluded as a cause of anaerobic botulism. :p |
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| Silky Johnson |
| So you think it's ok to abuse a person's basic human rights? Why do you think it's ok to hit children? |
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| couch-potato |
| Because it makes us laugh when sig'd. |
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| Lira |
| quote: | Originally posted by wienerschnitzel
i will find an alternative that is just as or more effective. |
Tell that, if they don't behave, William Ashley is going to lecture them about the importance of <insert random topic here>.
Bonus points if you convince them Bill is Jesus. |
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