|
Masturbation (pg. 8)
|
View this Thread in Original format
| LiquidX |
| LoL didn't ever step to this thread. I heard though that if you jerk off alot now, like at the end you end up heaving problems with fertility and all that, loose the desire for sex faster on the long term.. is that true?!?! |
|
|
| DJ RozzeR |
you guys best pace yourselves , you only get a bucket and a half !!
thats for the girlies, looks like u aint getting satisfied in the downstairs dept
how bout some another helping hand or a cucumber :P |
|
|
| RenderedDream |
i do it 2 times/week
i only feel bad after is about the cleanup! :crazy: :crazy: |
|
|
| Dj_ExOn |
One time in the morning and one in the evening.
And my gf squirts so it can get quite wet in bed. |
|
|
| RedLunatik |
Fatal Consequences of Excessive Masturbation
Frequent masturbation and ejaculation stimulate acetylcholine/parasympathetic nervous functions excessive can result in over production of sex hormones and neurotransmitters such as acetylcholine, dopamine and serotonin. Abundant and unusually amount of these hormones and neurotransmitters can cause the brain and adrenal glands to perform excessive dopamine-norepinephrine-epinephrine conversion and turn the brain and body functions to be extremely sympathetic. Other words, there is a big change of body chemistry when one excessively masturbation.
Note: Masturbation is a healthy sexual behavior. Like other behaviors, when over practiced or addicted it can lead to both psychological and physiological imbalances.
The side effects of such changes to the body include:
Fatigue. Feeling tired all the time
Lower back pain
Stress / Anxiety
Thinning hair / Hair Loss
Soft / Weak Erection
Premature Ejaculation
Eye floaters or fuzzy vision
Groin / Testicular Pain
Pain or cramp in the pelvic cavity or/and tail bone
If above symptoms are experienced, you need to restore the balance of brain's acetylcholine / parasympathetic ratio, reduces the level of sex hormones in the body, and sedates sympathetic nervous function, or the symptoms would become worsen.
 |
|
|
| speedracer_mec |
other terms for masturbation:
Having a session with the wise master
Hand start the one eyed yogurt thrower
Memory Bank Spank
Getting jiggy with it
Cleaning the snorkel
Mugging the Kojak Doll
Giving flipper a backrub
Making pudding'
Shaking hands with Mr. Happy
Making sewer babies
Dating the palm sisters
Cocking the Gun
Filling up the belly button well
Conditioning the leather
Rubbing one off
Satisfying King Solomon
Inflating the Zeppelin
Massaging the Marrionette, no strings attached
Extracting a core sample
Enforcing the "No Fly Zone"
Digital Manipulation of the Coital Apparatus
Testing out the magic love wand
The Rise and Fall of Peter the Great
Firing the Surgeon General
Squeaky the squirrel
Taking Herman to the circus
Freeing the soldiers of love
Boobytrapping a toilet seat
Galloping the lizard
Five finger boogie on the blue vein
Tickling little Tommy behind the ear
Walking the one eyed dog
Making gravy
Humping the old hand
Greasing The Baseball Bat
One man tug of War
Hang The Hamster
5 Digit Disco
Rocking the lil' man in the boat
The disappearing cigar trick
Male polishing the stinger
Checking the tweeters
Shaking hands with the wife's wedding present
Launching the heat seeking moisture missile
Filleting the trouser trout
Jerking my johnson
Lathering the Latin love lance
Bending to the will of the one eyed purple warrior
Spew from the column of delight
Honking bobo
Riding the one eyed wonder horse
Saying hello to my little friend
Prostate Maintenance
Honking the burrito
Pickle dancing
Skipping rocks off the lake of love
Shaving the cucumber
Faxing a hard copy to the Castro
Walking the dog
Using the Force
Flogging the dolphin
Whipping up some baby batter
Feeding your trouser-mouse
Jolting the bean
the cannon
Supply and Demand
Putting mayo on the knuckle sandwich
Doing the hand-jive
Firing the photon torpedoes
Shooting putty at the moon
The sperm manicure
Putting the dog's eye out
Rubbing the nub
Saying hi to big Jim and the twins
Verifying your manhood
Worshiping the fist prince
Yanking the penal cord
Flushing babies
The two fisted monkey slap
The blob blaster
Spewing crude
Wank your crank
Skanking the pickle
Smacking the pudge
Unrolling the turtle neck
Unsheathing the shlong
Shining the helmet
Dressing up like the mail man
Spit shining the trophy
Making love with miss Right
Spin the humming top
Letting off a few wrist rockets
Freeing the Willies
Petting the Parrot
Punching the Munchkin
Spanking the Monkey
Slapping the Salami
Choking the Chicken
Caressing the Cucumber
Doing the Mighty Wang Chung
Shining the Shaft
Tweaking the Totem Pole
Lubricating the Piston
Beating the Meat
Arming the Torpedo
Playing One Arm Bandit
Playing One Eyed Bandit
Playing the Skin Flute
Fondling the Fountain
Churning Butter
It's the Middle School Rodeo
Knuckle Shuffle on the Piss Pump
Gushing the Geyser
Milking the Heifer
Squeezing the Squirrel
Jerking Off
Pulling the Pud
Pulling a Pee-Wee
Going Blind
Growing Hair on the Palms
Waxing the Dolphin
Beating the Bishop
Jerking the Gherkin
Whacking Off
Pounding the Pepperoni
Cleaning the Canoli
Special Saucing the Big Mac
Fondling the Fahita
Banging the Burrito
Heisting the Jewels
Hustling the Hog
Waxing the T-Bird
Polishing the Rocket
Getting Your Pole Varnished
Chaffing the chimp
Making the Meat-Whistle
Torching the Taliwacker
Giving it a Tug
Shaking Hands with the Unemployed
Beating the boner
Handling the hard on
Yanking your chain
Sanding the woody
Lubricating the love stick
Sharpening the pencil
Tickling old one-eye
Making the Cyclops fight the five headed monster until he cries
Grabbing the grouse
Spackling the ceiling
Bopping the baloney
Pumping the gas
Draining the main vein
Worshiping the finger prince
Pumping the revolver
Shooting the 6 shooter
Polishing the family jewels
Waxing your Rocket
Spilling milk
Working the glue stick
Pleasing the turtle
Playing "hookey"
Walking the bearded one-eyed love dog
Beating the piss outta my best friend
Making a knuckle hot dog
Cuffing the carrot
Chugging the choo-choo
Making "Love" in the hand
Squeezing the cream out of the flesh Twinkie(tm)
Making Johnny Walker red
Playing Rumple Foreskin
Wrestling the Bald Headed Champ
Punching the Clown
Plucking the duck
Choking the snake
Tugging the Tapioca Tube
Getting to be better friends with Willy
Stretching before strenuous exercise
Taming Goliath
Corralling the Tadpoles
Jacking my Mule
Flogging yer dummy
Roughing up the suspect ('Cause you know he's guilty)
Putting miles on your monkey
Getting a little off-hand
roughing up grandpa shlong |
|
|
| Porky |
Top Ten Star Wars Fan Euphemisms For Not Having A Girlfriend
10.
Camping alone outside the theater.
9.
My force is no longer with me.
8.
The Death Star is not yet operational.
7.
The Empire's striking out.
6.
Shaking hands with the wookie.
5.
Darth Vader has no place to put his helmet.
4.
Oiling the droid.
3.
Unable to set coordinates for the planet Babe.
2.
Spending the night with Han Solo.
1.
Tractor beam not powerful enough. |
|
|
| Porky |
omg speedracermac!
awesome list
i am definitely
mr.5 Digit Disco!
hahahahah
Porky(oiling the droid) |
|
|
| hangover |
| The really annoying thing is trying to take a piss a few hours later... |
|
|
| DaveSaenz |
"ONE TIME @ bAND CAMP......"
:stongue: :stongue: :stongue: |
|
|
| Tranc3 |
| Wow that's a load of ways to say it - I'm gonna have to memorize a few:D |
|
|
|
|
