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Aggresive guys in clubs (pg. 13)
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| angelgirl |
| I too these days have to leave the dance floor around 4pm or so in order to avoid the gross men as that seems to be when these so called bottomfeeders like to make their move. I have had to sit out friends sets at SYSTEM because the guys on the dancefloor just wouldn't get the message...even after I have told them several times to back off and asked them to leave my friends alone. It seems that us females may have to resort to approaching bouncers for help in removing these types of guys if things get any worse out there. |
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| ali92 |
| Whilst I'm against the whole perverted stuff and think it's bad to willingly touch (in the wrong places) or hit people who don't want it, what about the good honest people who are the opposite like me (never aggressive and wouldn't think of doing perveted acts)? I don't believe in aggressive methods of 'picking' people 'up', however if I were going there alone, I really would wish I could find someone interested in the EDM too. I don't know how big Trance is up there, but down here, it's a very minority form of music that isn't listened to even by many clubbers. I never met any girls who were into Tiësto, AvB, PvD, Ferry Corsten, etc. and am not sure where to find peopel whom are single & are... How do others find romantic partners in here who are into EDM without asking around at clubs? Do you leave it up to pure chance? Anyone want to break it down to someone who's never been involved in a LTR before? |
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| The Highroller |
| Yea, it is a shame how guys who aren't psychos get bitched at by girls for just talking to them. The pervs and lunatics cause girls to have their guards up and think that every guy out there is out to get them. I don't blame them at all for it either. |
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| Jayx1 |
| quote: | Originally posted by Kytracid
Girls should do what an old club friend of mine used to do when she felt pushy guys not getting the hint. Light up a ciggerate, and burn that mofo's arm with it...then look up at him, sweetly smile and say "Ooops, i'm sorry...i guess you were standing too close". :D |
Yeah, assault is much more legal and moral than harrasment :rolleyes: |
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| ali92 |
| quote: | Originally posted by The Highroller
Yea, it is a shame how guys who aren't psychos get bitched at by girls for just talking to them. The pervs and lunatics cause girls to have their guards up and think that every guy out there is out to get them. I don't blame them at all for it either. |
You hit it right on the money! Something I'd like to add: [RANT BEGINS!] The ladies who aren't aggressive and seem like a decent person to be with _are already 'taken'_! I understand how it's good to keep the guard up for the pervs, but then how do honest decent people who wouldn't harm a fly be able to get a chance at finding someone compatible for them? It's not like we automatically know whether someone's taken or not or is looking or whatnot before we speak to them, or is it? (At least I don't, anyway.) The ignorant people would end up telling me to 'get a life' and get off my DSL connection downloading gigs/day whilst I read about int'l standardisation / technical stuff and actually go _OUTSIDE_, but I'm just trying to show here that just because you go out and look good, etc. doesn't mean you will be seccessful. I tend to have a hard time striking up a good conversation after speaking to someone more than like 5 times becasue my life tends to revolve around technology and education (who's life wouldn't if they spent 16 h/d on PC?). LOL [/Rant over!]. |
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| DigiNut |
| quote: | Originally posted by The Highroller
Definately not. I hate when people say, "look what she was wearing, she deserved it!".
BUT
If a girl is wearing slutty clothes, she should come to expect this kind of attention, regardless if it's right or wrong. |
Exactly.
There's no excuse for guys not taking no for an answer and trying to rape a girl on the dancefloor, especially if she's dressed normally.
However, some (I'd say many) girls want to have it both ways. They go out looking like skanks because they definitely do want the attention, they just don't want to be touched or actually picked up. And as is typical of girls that want it both ways, they tend to be the really bitchy ones who scream at every guy who comes within 3 feet of them and whine non-stop afterwards about how many guys come onto them (and they say it as a complaint so they don't sound like sluts, but in reality they find the attention flattering and even addictive).
Now ladies, before you freak out, I'm NOT saying that all girls are like this and I'm NOT saying that the creepy guys aren't a legitimate complaint (I myself said earlier that the girls do have it much worse). I'm just saying that the ones who clearly dress to get attention lose some of their moral authority in this debate. If you try for one moment to put yourself in the shoes of one of these creeps, it shouldn't be hard to figure out that they are 1000x more likely to get creepy with the girls dressed like skanks than they are with the ones wearing track suits.
Dressing up doesn't necessarily mean dressing slutty, either, and I think that's what seems to be the sore spot with a lot of the women who get involved in this argument. I've seen plenty of revealing outfits that don't look trashy, and I've seen and met plenty of attractive girls that don't give off those kinds of overtly sexual vibes. I suppose it's ultimately a matter of taste, but it's honestly not THAT hard to look in the mirror and say "You know, this really doesn't leave much to the imagination."
I don't really think I've met any women on tranceaddict that are guilty of this. But I see it all the time at clubs, the ones dressed in 2 square inches of clothes with massive frowns on their faces who just stand by the bar all night and never give so much as a "hop" on the dance floor. Well ladies, you obviously wanted attention, and you got it!
Creepy guys and attention-seeking women are BOTH problems, the former obviously being far worse, but that still doesn't negate the latter. |
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| ali92 |
| quote: | Originally posted by Jayx1
Yeah, assault is much more legal and moral than harrasment :rolleyes: |
I don't even know what constitutes 'sexual harassment'(sp?) legally -- even in my home country and city -- but I bet it's a VERY grey area of the law and greatly varies from country to country. That's why I'm sometimes afraid of approaching people beyong simple talking anymore. It seems that even compliments are interpreted much differently depending on the person. If I tell someone that she looks beautiful or nice, they may interpret it as something I didn't mean at all (like someone being 'hot' (sexually arousing) [I understand the 'beautiful' and 'hot' can be connected, but one's very informal and specifically implies something sexual; whereas 'beautiful' doesn't (usually, anyway)])... |
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| rabbitjoker |
| quote: | Originally posted by angelgirl
even after I have told them several times to back off and asked them to leave my friends alone. |
RJ technique: Tell them you have a massive herpes flare-up, burning and pussing bad - and right now is not the best time. |
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| rabbitjoker |
| quote: | Originally posted by jenna_rae
This was soooo funny when we tried this technique. |
And it scared the hell out of the bastard too.. ;) |
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| DJ El Kay Dee |
| quote: | Originally posted by angelgirl
It seems that us females may have to resort to approaching bouncers for help in removing these types of guys if things get any worse out there. |
dont be afraid to...one time when i was at system, i think it was when zabiela was here the last time, this one guy that was ed up on who knows what drug was being over pushy on teh bartender and all teh women that walked by...i went up to the bouncer adn got his ass evicted....well teh women that saw me get rid of him were quite friendly after too:D |
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| DigiNut |
| quote: | Originally posted by DJ El Kay Dee
dont be afraid to...one time when i was at system, i think it was when zabiela was here the last time, this one guy that was ed up on who knows what drug was being over pushy on teh bartender and all teh women that walked by...i went up to the bouncer adn got his ass evicted....well teh women that saw me get rid of him were quite friendly after too:D |
I think you got the roles reversed here? |
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| DJ El Kay Dee |
| quote: | Originally posted by DigiNut
I think you got the roles reversed here? |
no i didnt..just relating an incident and effective action that was taken based on my actions:rolleyes: |
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