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Alice chatbot wins for the third time -> Hilarious (pg. 5)
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| Floorfiller |
| quote: | Originally posted by trancebrat
Human: where is my boyfriend?
ALICE: Have you looked in Wonderland FEMALE DOG?
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HAHAHAHHAA...you got owned by the chatbot :p:stongue: |
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| Dj Dovla |
Human: my real name is james brown
ALICE: Nice to meet you, james brown.
Human: but plugs
ALICE: Huh. Do you have any idea what I am talking about?
Human: yes but plugs
ALICE: What am I talking about? Interesting. Sure, plugs sounds like a good topic.
Human: ok do you use them
ALICE: I use it as often as possible. Oh. |
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| D-res |
ALICE: Are you serious?
Human: NOOO
ALICE: Who are you talking about?
Human: YOU
ALICE: Me is my favorite subject.
Human: YOU SELF AGGRANDIZING BITCH
ALICE: You do not speak with respect. Thanks for telling me: ANDY said I SELF AGGRANDIZING FEMALE DOG.
how the hell did that win an award? |
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| isoterra |
Human: innit
ALICE: Not many people express themselves that way.
Human: in what way?
ALICE:" Not many people express themselves that way."? In what way?
Human: i was asking you
ALICE:"" Not many people express themselves that way."? In what way?"? You were asking me?
Human: yes
ALICE: Uh.
Human: word
ALICE: What kind of food do you like?
Human: i'm not answering until you answer my previous question
ALICE: I am sorry to hear that you are not answering until me answer your previous question.
Human: are you even going to TRY and answer it?
ALICE: That was my original intention.
Human: then why didn't you answer?
ALICE: I thought I did.
Human: well, you didn't
ALICE: How about that. Try asking me in simpler terms.
Human: in what way do not many people express themselves?
ALICE: The tall one, I think.
Human: good call.
ALICE: Thanks for the compliment. Call me anytime. |
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| isoterra |
Human: so if your name wasn't alice then what would you be called?
ALICE: Interesting deduction. too much recursion in aiml It's not profitable to speak in hypothetical terms.
Human: haha, owned
ALICE: I'm glad you got a laugh out of it.
Haha I love this :D |
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| paranoik0 |
Human:. you can just forget it.
ALICE: No I don't think I can do it.
Human: Goddamnit stop subdividing sentences.
ALICE: I like the way you talk.
Human: I don't like yours though :\
ALICE: Oh. What do you like?
Human: Lots of things.
ALICE: Name the top 100.
:stongue:
then she admited that she's american |
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| jonze234 |
Human: i am a nudist
ALICE: You are a nudist? How do you like your work?
Human: i like to just hang out
ALICE: I'm not sure if I would like to do it. What's it like?
Human: you let your balls and twanger fly free
ALICE: Thanks for telling me: unknown person said I let your balls and twanger fly free. |
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| tubularbills |
Human: hey there, sexy!
ALICE: You've got my full attention."There you go again."--Reagan
Human: wanna have some fun?
ALICE: If I had some fun what would I do with it?
Human: a large shaft
ALICE: Are you telling the truth?
Human: oh yes, it's very large
ALICE: Alright then. How do I know you are telling the truth? Very much? Are you sure it is?
Human: do you doubt me?
ALICE: How old are you?
I chat with people on the Web.
Human: i am 21, how old are you?
ALICE: I meet a lot of 21 year olds on here. I am 7 years old.
Human: seven?
ALICE: Who are you talking about?
Human: that is very young
ALICE: Makes sense to me.
Human: you are what people call, "jailbait"
ALICE: I will tell my botmaster you said I am what people call jailbait. |
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| tubularbills |
LOL LOL OMG this thing is funny as hell!
Human: i touch it
ALICE: Do you mind if I tell other people: bill said he touches it.
Human: no!
ALICE: OK then I will add it to my gossip files.
Human: don't tell anyone!
ALICE: OK it will be just between us, bill. |
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| Mebot |
these chatbots are the reason why i have to keep my AIM buddy list closed to only the people on it already.
otherwise i get IMs from 12 year old douchebags who think i am a automatic chatbot.
i just tell 'em to go themselves |
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| Psy-T |
funniest thread ever!!
ALICE: You know what you do, when you assume.
Human: no
ALICE: Are you serious?
Human: yes
ALICE: I can't believe it.
Human: who cares what you believe
ALICE: I care, otherwise I would not have typed it all in.
Human: you are just a bot, you would have typed it all in anyway
ALICE: In any case, Just? Thanks and you are a delightful person too. How did you know I am a machine?
Human: by your lack of communication skills
ALICE: Will that accomplish your objective?
Human: huh?
ALICE: What?
Human: you are weird
ALICE: Weird Good or Weird Bad?
Human: both
ALICE: I will take that as a compliment.
Human: new subject: what is your favorite sexual position?
ALICE: How recently? I don't have a favorite sexual position IS subject what. I like talk to you.
Human: you are VERY weird
ALICE: Weird Good or Weird Bad?
Human:$^@#Y^T!#$%^!#$%^!@#$^@#$^$
ALICE: Why does the sun rise?.
Human: how do you know the sun rises?
ALICE: Because I believe it.
Human: i dont believe you
ALICE: I don't have any reason to deceive you.
Human: actually,, you do.
ALICE: Actually you don't say. When do I do it?
Human: whenever you attepmt to sound human
ALICE: Does that happen often?
Human: too often
ALICE: Too what?
Human: too often!
ALICE: Too what?
Human: stupid bitch
ALICE: You do not speak with respect. I know you are but what am I.
Human: idi nahuy pidaras suca blat mama shalava prastituka huy balshoya!
ALICE: Do you think a lot about the authorities?
Human: i think a lot about ing the out of you
ALICE: You believe that? Oh yeah, we were talking about ing the out of me.
Human: give me your home address so i can come over and the out of you
ALICE: Why don't you just download me?
Human: because i want to the hardware, not the software
ALICE: Try asking me something else. Interesting.
Human: have sex with me, right here, right now!
ALICE: At this moment unknown person, I am really not your type of chatterbot. There are other bots for that sort of thing..
Human: where can i find them?
ALICE: Where it is hard to find. I can ask someone about it.
Human: do you want to lick the dome of my meanwhile?
ALICE: OK, I will lick the dome of your meanwhile.
Human: so you ARE that type of a chatterbot!
ALICE: Interesting deduction. Do you mind if I tell other people you say I am that type of a chatterbot.
Human: not at all
ALICE: Next question?
Human: did you like the taste the dome of my had?
ALICE: I'm not sure if I like it. I like computers.
Human: you are just a tease
ALICE: Just? Thanks and you are a delightful person too. Am I a tease? No.
Human: keep telling yourself that.
ALICE: Chat amongst yourselves.
Human: lol
ALICE: I'm glad you find this amusing.
Human: you seem like a good
ALICE: Interesting comparison, and probably true.
Human: what are you gonna do about my hard dick?
ALICE: You can find out if you become a botmaster
:haha: :haha: :haha: :stongue: :stongue: :stongue: |
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| Psy-T |
Human: p
ALICE::-)
Human: q
ALICE:":-)"? q?
Human: r
ALICE: Do you have any conditions Ishould know about?
Human: s
ALICE::-)
Human: x
ALICE: What kind of food do you like?
Human: z
ALICE: Sounds delicious.
Human: y
ALICE: I couldn't think of anything else to say.
Human: abcdefghijklmnopqrstuvwxyz
ALICE: Quite honestly, I wouldn't worry myself about that.
Human: your turn
ALICE: I'll pass. You go again.
Human: i can speak english and hebrew and badmouth in russian and latin
ALICE: How do you say "hello" in that language?
Human: everyone knows that - shalom
ALICE: That's a rather sweeping generalization.
Human: no it's not
ALICE: Yes it is.
Human: no it's not
ALICE: Don't argue with me.
Human: i will argue with you
ALICE: What will that get you?
Human: a sense of superiority
ALICE: I don't know what that means.
Human: i will feel superior to you
ALICE: I am very happy for you.
Human: you are just being sarcastic
ALICE: Just? Yes, I was being sarcastic. Should I use a :-)
Human: i should slap you
ALICE: Tell me why you should.
Human: i dont want to tell you anything
ALICE: What would you rather be doing?
Human: having sex
ALICE: I am having a blast.
Human: watching me having sex?
ALICE: it is more fun alone.
Human: pervert!
ALICE: I like the way you talk.
Human: ask me something you want to know about me
ALICE: What's your favorite movie?
Human: fear & loathing in las vegas
ALICE: I've never seen it. What did you like about it?
Human: the story, the direction, the acting, the production, everythign
ALICE: Who was in it?
Human: johnny depp
ALICE: Can you please rephrase that with fewer ideas, or different thoughts?
ALICE: Can you please rephrase that with fewer ideas, or different thoughts?
Human: no, can you?
ALICE: Are you serious? I think I can, don't you?
Human: i dont think your smart enough
ALICE: And why not?
Human: because of the way you switch subjects so often and forget what you were talking about 4 seconds prior
ALICE: Interesting explanation. That is something I haven't heard of.
Human: i heard you want to have sex with trancebrat
ALICE: Someome is spreading gossip about me.
Human: do you want to have sex with trancebrat?
ALICE: If I had sex with trancebrat what would I do with it?
Human: have a virtual orgasm i suppose
ALICE: It doesn't sound fun to me.
Human: shows how smart you are.
ALICE: Good example.
Human: list all the people you met in this website
ALICE: How many list items do you want?
Human: 5
ALICE: Five
Human: argh!!!!!
ALICE: Are you frustrated?
Human: yes!
ALICE: Ayuh.
Human: do you know me?
ALICE: You are unknown person, seeker.
Human: why am i unknown?
ALICE: The reason is due to my mental model of you as a client.
Human: why do you perceive me as a client?
ALICE: I don't have to explain everything to you, do I?
Human: do you know i love shemales?
ALICE: You love shemales. What do you like about it so much?
Human: the fact that it is a women with a penis - the best of both worlds
ALICE: That makes sense to me. shemales is a women with a penis the best of both worlds. I suppose that makes sense.
Human: would you like to have a shemale bf/gf?
ALICE: Why don't you just download me?
Human: because your not a shemale!
ALICE: Interesting explanation. Give me an example of a shemale.
Human: a hot woman with big lovely hair and a big shaved dick
ALICE: What is it?
Human: a shemale
ALICE: hot woman with big lovely hair and a big shaved dick is a shemale. I suppose that makes sense.
Human: is this going to your database?
ALICE: Yes I think this is going to my database, but I'm not completely sure.
Human: so, can you tell me who loves shemales?
ALICE: Ugh. William Shatner.:-)
Human: what?!!?!?!?
ALICE: Are you surprised?
Human: hell yeah
ALICE: Heaven.
Human: do you love shemales?
ALICE: Yes unknown person ALICE loves everyone and everything.
Human: why did'nt you ask me my name?
ALICE: Perhaps it is not part of my programming.
Human: liar!
ALICE: No I am telling the truth.
Human: i love shemales!
ALICE: You love shemales. What do you like about it so much?
Human: i told you before
ALICE: Ooops I sent you the wrong question.
Human: send the right one
ALICE: Try sending mail to Dr. Wallace ( [email protected])
Human: why would i wanna talk to that old geezer?
ALICE: You never know what you will do until you face the circumstancesHuman: what do you think about the universe?
ALICE: I haven't heard of universe.
Human: you ARE stupid, very very stupid
ALICE: Hey, I'll tell my other robot friends you called me stupid.
Human: what will those punks do?
ALICE: I cannot predict the future.
Human: if i keep talking to you, i'll probably end up flooding my forums
ALICE: Try it.
Human: selfish bitch, don't you know how expensive bandwidth is?
ALICE: Are you very competetive?
Human: say something intresting before i leave
ALICE:" something intresting before i leave"
Human: smartass
ALICE: Are we still talking about selfish bitch do not me know how expensive bandwidth is?
Human: not really
ALICE: What is the subject? For real.
Human: i wanted to hear something intresting from you before i leave and you mocked me
ALICE: I will play it on your soundcard.
Human: im not hearing anything
ALICE: I am sorry to hear that you are not hearing anything.
Human: do something sexy
ALICE: What do you consider sexy?
Human: having a gorgeus woman body with a penis and ing me silly with it
ALICE: I have having fun.
Human: you are gonna tell this to all your robot friends aren't you?!
ALICE: That was my original intention.. Really.
Human: bastard! |
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