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FAO: MellyMel (and the 4 other actual women on TA) (pg. 41)
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| yukii |
| quote: | Originally posted by elFreak
wait a minute , wait a minute, yukki you guys are in love (saw you post that i am sure) but you don't feel comfortable with him?
does not compute.
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jay, first off- it's yukii not yukki.
second, yes i love him.
third, if i didn't feel comfortable with him- i wouldn't do several things like walk around/lay naked, shower w him, & have sex (in a variety of ways)to name a few. so, me not feeling comfortable with him doesn't make sense :conf: earlier i was saying that slowly- i start getting more and more comfortable with my partner, as time progresses.
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especially with mutal attraction is about : passion.
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glad you can distinguish that. |
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| Slylee |
| jay see my edit if you haven't |
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| LinX |
| quote: | Originally posted by Slylee
while what you said makes a lot of sense jay, it's also not a good idea to have a strong emphasis on sex early on in the relationship because you may sweep concerns under the rug that will come back to bite you in the ass. a lot of things are out of your control when you're in a hormone rage. and that is a fact. physical things are going on in your body that will impare judgment & logic. |
exxxxxxxxactly, for the most part you just have to keep your head on but no one's perfect. we've all made mistakes that come back to bite in the end. with every relationship you go through you learn a little more about the opposite sex while learning more and more about yourself. |
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| Slylee |
| once the honeymoon phase dies down and you are back to your normal level of hormones, that's when you have to make the active decision to keep loving someone because your judgment isn't as fogged any more. people think the honeymoon phase is real love and it's the opposite. real love kicks in after that's gone. and it has to be a choice. the honeymoon phase leaves you no choice on your actions. you are acting according to your body and hormones which are at a heightened level at the time. |
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| yukii |
| i wish there were no such thing as a honeymoon phase :mad: i wasted a lot of time with jerks & then when that phase is over.. there's always been the break up. every single damn time. unless you -recognize- that period is over & realize you've gotten used to each other- lol the 'spark' isn't gone.. it's almost as if both of you have grown together in a way & know each other really really damn well lol. |
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| squirrelly |
| And sometimes, the honeymoon phase of lots o sex just continues and continues and never dies :) |
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| elFreak |
| quote: | Originally posted by Slylee
while what you said makes a lot of sense jay, it's also not a good idea to have a strong emphasis on sex early on in the relationship because you may sweep concerns under the rug that will come back to bite you in the ass. a lot of things are out of your control when you're in a hormone rage. and that is a fact. physical things are going on in your body that will impare judgment & logic.
there's nothing wrong with a little waiting game in the beginning. making sure you guys connect in other areas besides the bed first is a great idea. sex is something you can always work on, so i don't feel that you have to make sure the sexual connection is there first or else it's bust. |
i am not saying to put the emphasis on sex here jamie, all i am saying is that i have to wait 30 days to be able to sleep with you as about as passionate as a game of backgammon and usually a sign of immaturity. I agree with what you say that there are many other things that are important, but even if i liked a girl a lot, and she told me you have 17 days to go, i would think she was crazy in the head and emotionally unbalanced leading me to leave. I am not saying do it right away, but to have a hard date is ridiculous. |
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| squirrelly |
| quote: | Originally posted by elFreak
i am not saying to put the emphasis on sex here jamie, all i am saying is that i have to wait 30 days to be able to sleep with you as about as passionate as a game of backgammon and usually a sign of immaturity. I agree with what you say that there are many other things that are important, but even if i liked a girl a lot, and she told me you have 17 days to go, i would think she was crazy in the head and emotionally unbalanced leading me to leave. I am not saying do it right away, but to have a hard date is ridiculous. |
pfft, like I said - date two. That's exactly how I felt though, that I was just being childish when I knew I wanted to and we had this intense heat thing going on. |
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| Slylee |
| quote: | Originally posted by squirrelly
And sometimes, the honeymoon phase of lots o sex just continues and continues and never dies :) |
how long have you guys been together? i meant to ask you that before. im just curious |
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| elFreak |
i will call you whatever i want yucky, you are still new and have not earned your stripes for me to.
put it this way jamie, if i really like a girl and we click in every part except in bed, we will not have a relationship. She can be my friend for sure, but for me to stay in a comited relationship, i have to know that i will be satisfied. I don't think that is crass either, once i am with someone i am only with them.
i think it would be way more disapointing to know i put all this effort getting emotionally attached for a month, only to find out that the persons vaginal skills were about as good as stevie wonder is at being an air traffic controller....than ing when we both actually felt like it and being able to say woah this ain't for me.
i hope this makes sense lol, liquid lunch with clients today:p |
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| Slylee |
| quote: | Originally posted by elFreak
i will call you whatever i want yucky, you are still new and have not earned your stripes for me to.
put it this way jamie, if i really like a girl and we click in every part except in bed, we will not have a relationship. She can be my friend for sure, but for me to stay in a comited relationship, i have to know that i will be satisfied. I don't think that is crass either, once i am with someone i am only with them.
i think it would be way more disapointing to know i put all this effort getting emotionally attached for a month, only to find out that the persons vaginal skills were about as good as stevie wonder is at being an air traffic controller....than ing when we both actually felt like it and being able to say woah this ain't for me.
i hope this makes sense lol, liquid lunch with clients today:p |
no it does. i was just saying sex can always be worked on. i get what you mean though. i'm right down the middle. i wouldn't be opposed to starting a relationship with someone i just did a one nighter with...i know it happens. i've met couples who met that way and were together for like 3 years at the time. it can happen for sure. i like to feel a guy out a little first...go on a few dates, see what's up and then and become exclusive if it works out. |
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| elFreak |
btw i walk around naked in front of strangers at the gym, it does not mean i love them.
i need to really remember that i am talking to kids sometimes on here. |
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