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I hope Terri Schiavo's husband (pg. 5)
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| Jem_hadar |
| quote: | Originally posted by Kytracid
It’s easy to be righteous and demonize the man when you don’t have to walk a day in his shoes. He’s still legally married to her for a reason. He believes that she wouldn’t want to live this way. Now maybe he’s wrong (we’ll never know since she didn’t make a living will), but by getting a divorce he would in effect hand over control of her life to the state of Florida which by law has to keep her alive.
Now I understand we are treading in murky waters here, and there’s no ‘right’ answer in what should happen to Terri, but to say that her husband shouldn’t be allowed to move on with his life is ridiculous. Yes, he’s married to her. But she’s brain dead people! How dare we hold him to hypocritical double standards and go so far as to suggest that he should spend the rest of his life alone, tending to her, when his marital status has changed so radically after his wife suffered a stroke. Half the marriages in the states involving healthy, able-bodied people end in divorce on flippant excuses like 'irreconcilable differences', and you want THIS man to stick to those antiquated marriage vows. It’s completely absurd!
Also, let's take a moment and talk briefly about all this ‘bling’ he’s supposed to have received from all these lawsuits. Well, $750,000 of that was for Terri, with another $300,000 for himself. People have been awarded more then that in the US for spilling hot coffee over themselves, so is $300,000 really that much for misdiagnosis that led to the deterioration in her condition? I personally think he should have got a lot more! He was also offered $1,000,000 (some reports say it might even have been up to $10,000,000) to walk away from Terri and hand over control to Terri’s parents. He refused to do so (even though technically the power to do so resides with the courts only).
Maybe her husband is doing this for the money, maybe…We can speculate all we want and paint the man as a cruel husband who tortured his wife and now continues to profit from her conditon. But to me, it seems like the type of spin the media love to put on any tragic story. To provide that classic villain which any good saga needs in order to sell newspapers. The truth is that Micheal Schiavo did care for his wife even after she became legally brain dead. The Second District's first decision in the case used these words to describe Michael's care for Terri:
Look, I can’t imagine how difficult it must be for Terri’s parents to watch their child suffer like this. I’m sure they are holding out hope that the marvel of modern medicine will deliver their daughter from the 15 year nightmare she has had to endure. I don’t blame them for not accepting what the medical opinion of experts in that Terri has almost no chance of ever leading the type of life that you and I consider normal. While it’s impossible to know what will happen in 5 years in terms of therepy, it should be remembered that the Schindlers (Terri’s parents) had two experts who proposed a potential therapy method, but the trial court rejected both of them based on "the total absence of supporting case studies or medical literature".
I don’t want to suggest that the Schindlers are fighting in vain, because I believe if you love someone, you shouldn’t be deprived of the right to fight till the very end to save them. The pessimist in me though doesn’t believe this is a fight they will win. And perhaps through this whole ordeal, parental love has blinded them to the condition their daughter is in, muting the answer to the question they should ask themselves – would Terri really want to continue fighting a 15 year, losing battle ? I think like most people, I can only answer that question if I put myself in her place and considered what choice I would make. The soft whisper of my inner voice says – No…I wouldn’t.
It’s time to stop looking for a monster in the face of tradegy and think about the real victim; who has always been - Terri Schiavo. Taking the moral highground and keeping that poor woman alive might help you sleep better at night, but till you are asleep for 15 years you can’t possibly imagine her plight.
PS. Shadowolf suggests that Terri might be conscious because she seems to make eye contact and react to situations. It should be understood that various medical teams have conducted experiments to test the validity of those claims. While it’s impossible to tell for sure, most of them agree that those movements are involuntary reflexes.
Death is but a transition; and one that takes immense courage to accept . I can't imagine the level of strength needed to look into the eyes of a person you love and to realize that it is time to free them of their mortal coil... |
Wow. Your reasoning and way with words along with your remarkable ability to express your thoughts amazes the outta me.
I coudlnt have said it better (nor indeed even have come close)
+1 Well said Kytracid. Thats exactly it! |
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| Orko |
its cruel and painful that she has to die by starvation.
but if i was in her position, i would want to be taken off the feeding tube as well.
the fact is, that she needs to die. This is the only way she can die, without somebody directly killing her, even though they are indirectly killing her in this case.
Just let the poor women live her last days in peace. I cant believe how much press this is getting. I would have thought it was more common in the US. |
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| b4k-oz |
| quote: | Originally posted by ShadoWolf
I guess you people want to kill the Pope too? Just another "useless eater." :rolleyes:
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The Pope and Terri are two complex and totally different matters.
With Terri, your trying to pass a judgement on the husbands...and his choice to end his and his wife's suffering. The right to move on and end (or begin life) with dignity.
The Pope doesn't have a wife making a decision to pull the tubes on him.
Jayx1 you've succeeded again to stir up . You and ShadoWolf seem to share the same negative outlook in life....you guys must be very lonely :( |
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| ShadoWolf |
| quote: | Originally posted by b4k-oz
With Terri, your trying to pass a judgement on the husbands...and his choice to end his and his wife's suffering. The right to move on and end (or begin life) with dignity. |
That man is her husband in name only. He has a new common law wife and children. He also stands to personally profit from Terri's death. The people best able to speak for Terri are her father, mother and siblings who've cared for her daily for 15 years. They are better able than anyone to assess her condition.
What dignity is there in starving to death?
| quote: | | You and ShadoWolf seem to share the same negative outlook in life....you guys must be very lonely :( |
That's ironic coming from someone who wants to see people killed.
:rolleyes: |
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| Jayx1 |
| quote: | Originally posted by Skipper
What is your position on this issue? I'm curious.
Surely you don't think that God's natural way is keeping her "alive" for another 50 years. |
If it's clear she wanted to die then she should be allowed to be euthenized. If there is any doubt she should live. That, and the husband is a tool.
I'm not nec against allowing her to die. It's starving her to death and letting the husband decide after having 2 kids with another woman that i object to. I had a brother who was disabled (although had full mental capacities) so thats why i feel very strongly about this. |
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| Jayx1 |
| quote: | Originally posted by b4k-oz
Jayx1 I don't know why your the way you are, and frankly I don't understand it, but IMHO you don't have the right to judge this man unless you've gone through the same as he has.
Firstly, you've never been in any real or meaningful relationship...you haven't even been married and don't know the first thing about such a sacred union.
Jayx1, I think your comments on this matter is very disrespectful to her and to her husband. You don't even know what struggles he's had to endure to come to this decision...and you will never understand the pain that he's going to go through, once she's gone :( |
I love how you especially always seems to think you know me so well based on a few political statements on a website. :rolleyes:
Read above |
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| rabbitjoker |
| quote: | Originally posted by ShadoWolf
The people best able to speak for Terri are her father, mother and siblings |
According to the law no. |
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| Jayx1 |
| quote: | Originally posted by b4k-oz
Jayx1 you've succeeded again to stir up . |
Good this stuff needs to be discussed in society. Hopefully this will motivate everyone to get a living will. I know i will be.
Funny how you are portraying me as a dick because i feel she should
live.
:rolleyes: |
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| ShadoWolf |
| quote: | Originally posted by rabbitjoker
According to the law no. |
Not if he's acting in bad faith. As guardian, he has to act in HER best interests, not his. |
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| Skipper |
| quote: | Originally posted by j_spot
the reason its different is that terri had directed people not to have her kept alive by mechanical means. The popes cases is completly different. |
Nevermind the fact that the pope has a personality and a chance at recovery. |
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| MarkT |
| quote: | All-out coverage of Schiavo wears thin
No real look at causes of bulimia
ANTONIA ZERBISIAS
"It appears the parents of Terri Schiavo have run out of options ...
meaning the Schiavo feeding tube will soon be removed from the cable news networks."
You can count on The Daily Show With Jon Stewart to inject cynicism into what has been, you should pardon the expression, a media feeding frenzy over a brain-damaged woman.
But then, once the White House and U.S. Congress entered the fray, it was tough to fault news organizations for being all over this tragic story of a beautiful young woman who so desperately wanted to be thin that she destroyed her life, and the lives of those who love her.
Even coverage of the coverage has been copious.
Critics have correctly attacked CNN and other organizations for distorting the presentation of opinion polls on the matter. An MSNBC host intimated that Schiavo's husband Michael is a "Nazi'' for wanting to remove her feeding tube. Fox News has come under fire for failing to identify demonstrators as members of an anti-abortion group. It even invited cancelled TV psychic John Edward to read Schiavo's mind.
And, if all that wasn't disgusting enough, how about the syndicated radio host, Glenn Beck, who claims to have raised $5 million (U.S.) in pledges "to buy" Schiavo from her husband "if he will divorce her and give guardianship rights to her parents."
It was the perfect Easter week story, a life and death drama with talk of miracles and resurrections mixed in with some of the worst coverage of any event ever.
Doctors who never went near the patient were called upon to diagnose her. Politicians spoke as if they were medical experts. Just about any nurse who changed a bedpan in the same hospital at some time during Schiavo's 15-year ordeal might have gotten facetime.
Meanwhile, the media, cowed by the "moral values" crowd, rarely asked
legitimate questions that needed asking. For example, how U.S. President George W. Bush, who cut short his vacation to preserve the "sanctity of life," can also justify the death penalty.
Much of the coverage was fuelled by clips from some 4 1/2 hours of
videotape shot by Schiavo's parents who made them public. They have become a Rorschach in this debate. One sees what one wants to see — and many see exactly what the parents hope they see.
That the segments represent only a few moments of Schiavo's life is either ignored or glossed over. That they might be as misrepresentative as, say, shooting one minor scuffle at the edge of a massive but otherwise peaceful demonstration and then calling the protest "violent" is also never said.
What they show is an apparently sentient Terri, vocalizing, tracking a
balloon and moving to music.
Kind of like a newborn really.
Which is probably the point.
Nobody can condemn the parents for resorting to manipulative measures to keep their daughter close, and alive.
Yet this is a woman whose body image drove her to risk her health in the first place, a woman who had a deadly obsession about her appearance.
As her brother-in-law Scott Schiavo told the New York Times, Terri would have been mortified by the video.
"She was very, very particular about the way she looked, very proud when she walked out the door," he said last week. "She would be so upset to have the world seeing her that way."
Not surprising.
A once fat teenager who had lost 65 pounds, Terri Schiavo was so terrified of regaining her excess weight that she willingly purged her body of sustenance, and in a rather violent fashion.
"The irony is very cruel indeed," observes Jean Kilbourne, an expert on how women are portrayed in advertising, and author of Can't Buy My Love: How Advertising Changes the Way We Think and Feel. "I don't think it's an issue of vanity. I think it's much, much deeper.
"Women, young women, get the message that their value depends entirely on how they look and, these days, on being extremely thin."
Of course, nobody knows what, if anything, is in Terri Schiavo's mind
right now. Maybe if, somewhere deep down inside, Terri really does have consciousness, she wouldn't mind seeing herself on TV over and over again looking slack-jawed and stupid.
Why care, if it saves her life?
Which brings us back to the media, who are profiting mightily from
Schiavo's terrible fate, with this perfectly made-to-measure big ratings story.
Throughout this wrenching moral and political uproar, they alone have
escaped castigation.
Yet they have much to answer for. They and the advertisers that feed them are the ones who promote unrealistic images of tall, willowy women without an ounce of excess flesh — except of course in the two right places.
"Imagine," says Kilbourne, "if all this energy and media attention focused instead on the self-loathing and hatred of their own bodies that our culture generates in women, and the rampant eating disorders that often result. Now that might save the lives of many young women for whom it is not too late." |
discuss...
regardless of the whole story behind the scenes, the media coverage has been *ridiculous*...and Bush should really STFU...dude has been commenting on this, the NBA brawl, the MLB steroid scandal, the NHL labour dispute...STFU AND DO YOUR REAL JOB...the Bush admin. has much larger issues with which to concern themselves :whip:
my thoughts...starving someone to death, whether or not they are conscious of what is happening to them...is distasteful at best, but actually is barbaric and cowardly, IMHO. As if this is "letting her die". Nice cop out...SHE IS BEING PUT TO DEATH...the action of removing her feeding tube is 100% NO DIFFERENT (except in the minds of family and doctors and the courts) than providing her with a quick, DIGNIFIED death (which I'd be ok with them doing, IF this was her explicit wish via a will). |
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| Skipper |
| quote: | Originally posted by Jayx1
It's starving her to death and letting the husband decide after having 2 kids with another woman that i object to. |
What does his other family have to do with anything? I've never really understood this. |
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