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another joke thread (pg. 5)
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| Slylee |
| yay! someone laughed:D |
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| dj tek |
| quote: | Originally posted by Slylee
yay! someone laughed:D |
too bad it wasnt someone you didnt know |
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| Slylee |
| quote: | Originally posted by dj tek
too bad it wasnt someone you didnt know |
:( |
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| lücid |
| quote: | Originally posted by Slylee
yay! someone laughed:D |
reminds me of another one i like...
There's an English man, Irish man and a Scotsman. They're being chased by a policeman. They see this old warehouse so they run in. Inside there are 3 empty sacks on the floor. They each jump in a sack. In comes the copper and see's these three bundles on the floor. Goes up to the first one and kicks it. The English man shout out, "Woof Woof", and the copper thinking it's just an old dog leaves it and kicks the second sack. The Scotsman yells out, "Me-ow me-ow", he leaves this one as well thinking its just an old cat. He walks over to the last sack and kicks it, and the Irish man yells out.. "Potatoes Potatoes..!" |
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| Slylee |
| quote: | Originally posted by lücid
reminds me of another one i like...
There's an English man, Irish man and a Scotsman. They're being chased by a policeman. They see this old warehouse so they run in. Inside there are 3 empty sacks on the floor. They each jump in a sack. In comes the copper and see's these three bundles on the floor. Goes up to the first one and kicks it. The English man shout out, "Woof Woof", and the copper thinking it's just an old dog leaves it and kicks the second sack. The Scotsman yells out, "Me-ow me-ow", he leaves this one as well thinking its just an old cat. He walks over to the last sack and kicks it, and the Irish man yells out.. "Potatoes Potatoes..!" |
u only say "potatoes" once:o
i tell that one all the time. haha |
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| lücid |
| quote: | Originally posted by Slylee
u only say "potatoes" once:o
i tell that one all the time. haha |
bah, i couldn't remember how the joke went so i copied it from another forum. |
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| Slylee |
So these 2 fags (all-nite-freak & orbax) decide they want a baby. So one of them jerks off in a cup and they get their good girlfriend to get impregnated by the sperm and have the kid for them.
So 9 months later she has it and they’re in the hospital looking through the glass window at all the babies. Every one of them is screaming crying except for one of the babies in the back. So Orbax goes, “Aww, look at that quiet one in the back” and the doctor walks up and says, “That’s actually your baby”
So ANF & Orbax start jumping up and down like the raging homos they are and they’re like, “yay! The quiet baby is ours! That’s so cute, omg rofllmao”
And the doctor goes, “pshh, yea he’s quiet now, but wait until I take that pacifier out of his ass” |
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| tranceDJ |
| quote: | Originally posted by lücid
reminds me of another one i like...
There's an English man, Irish man and a Scotsman. They're being chased by a policeman. They see this old warehouse so they run in. Inside there are 3 empty sacks on the floor. They each jump in a sack. In comes the copper and see's these three bundles on the floor. Goes up to the first one and kicks it. The English man shout out, "Woof Woof", and the copper thinking it's just an old dog leaves it and kicks the second sack. The Scotsman yells out, "Me-ow me-ow", he leaves this one as well thinking its just an old cat. He walks over to the last sack and kicks it, and the Irish man yells out.. "Potatoes Potatoes..!" |
Reminds me of:
Theres an English man, German man, and Polish man each lined up to be shot. The English man is first and yells "tornado!!" and manages to get away. Before the German man can be shot he yells "hurricane!!" and also manages to get away. Finally they get to the Polish man and trying to follow suit he yells "FIRE!!":haha: |
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| infinity HiGH |
| quote: | Originally posted by Slylee
it's way funnier when i tell this one, but whatever lol
So this farmer brings in 3 strapping young men to help him put on a new roof. He brings them into his home and introduces them to his wife and hot young daughter.
“this is my wife and daughter. Now listen fellas, u guys are gonna be sleeping out in the barn and not one of you is to step foot in this house while you are staying here and helping me fix my roof, blab la bla”
The whole time he’s saying this, the daughter is standing behind her dad giving the guys naughty looks and winking at them.
So later that night, the 3 guys are in the barn drinking beer and talking about how they all want to the daughter. So the first guy is like, “she’s gonna get it, I’m sneaking in to do it”
So he sneaks in the house and he’s on his way up the stairs and all of a sudden there is a loud, “CREEEEEK” and he freezes. The father busts open his bedroom door upstairs with a shotgun and goes, “WHO’S THERE!” and so the guy makes a funny “Meeoooowwww” noise and the father goes, “ahh , it’s just the cat” and goes back in his bedroom.
The guy continues up the stairs and bangs the daughter and sneaks back to the barn to tell about it.
So the 2nd guy is like, “man, I’m going to get some” and as he’s leaving, the first guy goes, “oh yea, dude…try not to step on like the 4th step I think….it makes noise. Just meow like the cat if u do and he comes out with his gun”
“ok”
So he goes, and tries to miss the step, but fails. “CREEEEEK”
“WHO’S THERE!”
“Meeoowwww”
“oh dang, the cat again”
So he bangs the daughter and makes his way back to the barn. By this time the 2 other guys are hammered. So the 3rd guy is like, “ok fellas, I’m up!” and on his way out the door, the other guy goes, “dude! Remember! If u step on the noisy step, just pretend you’re the cat”
“yea yea, I know”
So he goes, and sure enough…steps on the noisy step.
“WHO’S THERE!”
“IT’S ME! THE CAT!” |
this is in jokes, but next time you need to add nationalities to those 3 dudes. Eg. 1 is a german, 1 russian, and 1 polak. The polak should be the one that says "It's me. The cat" |
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| Slylee |
| quote: | Originally posted by infinity HiGH
this is in jokes, but next time you need to add nationalities to those 3 dudes. Eg. 1 is a german, 1 russian, and 1 polak. The polak should be the one that says "It's me. The cat" |
lol
good idea |
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| occrider |
| quote: | Originally posted by tranceDJ
Reminds me of:
Theres an English man, German man, and Polish man each lined up to be shot. The English man is first and yells "tornado!!" and manages to get away. Before the German man can be shot he yells "hurricane!!" and also manages to get away. Finally they get to the Polish man and trying to follow suit he yells "FIRE!!":haha: |
Three prisoners escape from a German POW camp, an American, a Russian, and a Polak. The 3 hear the Germans chasing them so the Russian suggests they all hide in different trees.
The Germans hear rustling from above so they go investigate the American's tree. The American yells out "CAW CAW, CAW CAW" and the Germans move on thinking it's a bird.
They then go to the Russian's tree and the Russian yells out, "Whooo Whooo" so the Germans move on thinking it's an owl.
Finally they get to the Polak's tree and the Polak yells out, "Moooooo".
So then they capture the stupid Polak, tear out his gold teeth, and then cook him in the crematorium. Funny no? |
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| Orbax |
| quote: | Originally posted by Slylee
So these 2 fags (all-nite-freak & orbax) decide they want a baby. So one of them jerks off in a cup and they get their good girlfriend to get impregnated by the sperm and have the kid for them.
So 9 months later she has it and they’re in the hospital looking through the glass window at all the babies. Every one of them is screaming crying except for one of the babies in the back. So Orbax goes, “Aww, look at that quiet one in the back” and the doctor walks up and says, “That’s actually your baby”
So ANF & Orbax start jumping up and down like the raging homos they are and they’re like, “yay! The quiet baby is ours! That’s so cute, omg rofllmao”
And the doctor goes, “pshh, yea he’s quiet now, but wait until I take that pacifier out of his ass” |
id do a "fixed" swapping out IGK for the pacifier somehow but Lucid warned me earlier :( |
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