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Barrie Teen runs away, parents blame Video Games (pg. 5)
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| Orko |
| quote: | Originally posted by ChemEnhanced
When my school work was done I was allowed to play my pac-man and space invaders but only for an hour or two at max.
Personally, that is more then enough time for a kid to have some fun playing games. The parents should have established a daily or weekly limit of play time from the minute they allowed him to have a console system. |
This used to be true when games were simple. Video games are far more complex, and even educational these days. There is a lot of reading, logic puzzles, and simulation built in to engage the player much more than 20 years ago.
Really this whole drama has nothing to do with video games at all, but simply the battle between a child and his parents. The child wanted to conduct an activity (build computers, paint, play baseball, transistor radio, video games...etc) and the parents wanted to limit how much time he spent on that activity.
Every generation of kids picks up an activity that they become hooked on. Video games are the new ham radios. |
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| ChemEnhanced |
| quote: | Originally posted by Orko
This used to be true when games were simple. Video games are far more complex, and even educational these days. There is a lot of reading, logic puzzles, and simulation built in to engage the player much more than 20 years ago.
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Yes video games are more complex....but you don't need to finish the game in one night. I bet he was playing online where you just go and shoot the out of each team....so really its not a complex game. I have call of duty 4 and all I will play is online....I haven't even bothered with the actual story line game...and I have no interest in the story line game....just like a lot of game players nowadays....they want to play online and talk to their online friends from around the world. |
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| Skipper |
| quote: | Originally posted by kaniz
Since when was being a kid/teen living under your parents roof and their rules a fair deal? Being treated "fairly" and with "respect" as a teen is something that needs to be earned by the child, not a free gift that is dolled out nilly-willy.
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Personally I don't think there's a lesson in getting your kid to pay for something him or herself, and then not allowing them to use it as they please. If you're going to force your kid to fork over a huge amount of money for a video console, then generally speaking, it's theirs to use as they want. If it's not, they're not going to pay for and they'll just nag the parent until they relent, and never learn anything about self-management.
A lot of people in the 25-40 age range now can't comprehend the entitlement that the new generation has - I know I have trouble. My brother is 15 and it blows my mind. But this is just how the new generation is, and you either have to work with it or resign yourself to wasting all your energy fighting it. |
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| Djsketchbag |
| LoL I remeber when I lived in Madrid when i was in Grade 2 and 3 and i was so addicted to the Snow Bro's Arcade That i would steal money form my parents and go play all day at the arcade ..... then i got busted and got beaten black and blue and made to kneel in my room with my hands behind my head for 5 hours and i never did it again Euro Parenting FTW |
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| kaniz |
| I had an older sister who'd get all the time for misbehaving. I learned by watching her and thinking "I don't want to deal with that" and stayed generally well behaved :P |
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| kaniz |
| quote: | Originally posted by Skipper
A lot of people in the 25-40 age range now can't comprehend the entitlement that the new generation has - I know I have trouble. My brother is 15 and it blows my mind. But this is just how the new generation is, and you either have to work with it or resign yourself to wasting all your energy fighting it. |
Down with entitlement, up with wooden-spoons!
Seriously, parents need to stop being such soft-asses, but this needs to start at a young age. You cant be all soft'y on them as kids then switch gears once they hit the teens.
The I see / hear about my cousins getting away with, or the younger kids leaves me scratching my head thinking "what the hell? my mom would NEVER let me get away with that"
| quote: |
Personally I don't think there's a lesson in getting your kid to pay for something him or herself, and then not allowing them to use it as they please
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I fully disagree - the lesson to be learned is that even if you do pay for it, you need to use it responsibly or there will be consequences. As a teen, these consequences may result in simply not being able to use it, but - growing up and moving out on your own these consequences are far more serious.
Lets take me for an example - 26, moved out, paying my own way. I paid for my computer, my internet - I can argue "well - because I'm paying for it, I should be able to use it as often as I want" (which, is very true - and I do usually). But, that also comes with responsibility - going to work, cleaning the apartment, doing chores, groceries, laundry, etc.
Now, being on my own - I only have myself to enforce these rules, or suffer the consequences - messy apartment, no clean clothes, if it's impacting my work (ie: showing up late, skipping work to play games, whatever) - it's a crazy thing called learning self-moderation.
Now, if you have a responsible kid that is keeping up their grades, going to school and showing that they can handle the job of using their stuff responsibility : Great, no need to start taking stuff away from them.
But, if your kid is NOT having some level of self-moderation, it's time to do your job as a parent and force them to learn that lesson, even if it does mean taking away something that they have earned / paid for themselves.
Example situation:
- Say, kid is 16, earned his own XBOX360 and games - great for him.
- He starts playing too much, and starts to neglect chores
- Take it away until he does his chores,
Or, say - if your currently doing their laundry for them - stop doing it, make them do it themselves. If they bitch about not having clean clothes - tell them to do it themselves, if they dont do it - take away the XBOX until their own laundry gets done, then give it back once it's done. But make it 100% clear
- "I can keep this away from you all week if you don't do your laundry, or - spend an hour or two doing your laundry, and do your homework while it's in the wash/dryer - and you'll get your XBOX back at the end of it. Or, sit here pulling a hissy-fit all week, and you wont get it back at all. Keep up with doing this on your own, and I won't take it away from you"
You need to be consistent in this though and not be a softy - eventually, the kid *should* get the drift : If I keep up with my chores, doing my laundry and homework and doing a bit of self-moderation so I have time to get these things done, I have my XBOX there when I want to play it whenever I want, as long as I want (as long as the other stuff is getting done). |
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| Yohan |
| I got a good laugh when a kid (well, 18 yr old freshman) on his dorm at university has to teach girls how to use the washing machine |
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| kaniz |
I couldn't get over it when there were kids in my 3rd year Univ class mentioning how their parents still packed their lunches for them :|
Christ, I was making my own lunches by time I was in grade 3. |
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| gummybear |
| just heard today that microsoft is giving $25000 to add to the existing $25000 as a reward.... |
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| High on PSI |
| quote: | Originally posted by Dr. Z
FFS people, beat your kids! |
Blunt, but somewhat true. Maybe not beat them, but kids really do need to fear their parents, and they dont anymore. |
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| teufel-man |
| quote: | Originally posted by kaniz
I couldn't get over it when there were kids in my 3rd year Univ class mentioning how their parents still packed their lunches for them :|
Christ, I was making my own lunches by time I was in grade 3. |
hahaha I have friends like that.... mom packs their lunch (including juice box and cheese string, lol!), also does their wash, irons their shirts, etc.
I find it ridiculous! They need to grow the hell up and learn to do this by themselves! |
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| DigiNut |
| quote: | Originally posted by ChemEnhanced
When I was a kid...I didn't have anything entertaining in my room...my bedroom was to sleep in. |
Same here.
I'll come right out and admit it - I was an anti-social geek at that age. But I still never got addicted to games or anything online. I credit my parents with two things:
1. Not throwing an overabundance of disposable income at me, which meant I couldn't afford most of this crap in the first place;
2. Not putting any type of entertainment in my room. Eventually I did get a crappy old TV, but by that time I hardly watched any TV anymore and they knew it.
There seems to be a growing belief among modern parents that refusing to buy all the frivolous garbage their kids want somehow makes them bad parents. Or maybe these people just don't know how to say "no". It's the same thing with the skanky clothes they buy for tweens. Just say no! And if kids want to make their own money and buy it themselves, fine; if their entertainment is dependent upon their own revenue stream then they're unlikely to skip work to play games. |
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