|
I'm in love with a friend and I don't know what to do (pg. 2)
|
View this Thread in Original format
| Jennifer_P_ |
| quote: | Originally posted by ChemEnhanced
Guys are friends with girls for one reason and one reason only. |
99.999% of the time - agreed |
|
|
| *~LiSa-LoO~* |
| quote: | Originally posted by Jennifer_P_
99.999% of the time - agreed |
I disagree. I think there's a difference btwn a guy actually wanting to sleep with a girl friend and a guy saying "ya, I'd sleep with her if she wanted to". I don't think that all guys actively desire to sleep with their girl friends. But I think they probably all would sleep with them if the girl wanted to.
Though, obviously I'm a girl and I can't say for sure. lol |
|
|
| Jennifer_P_ |
| quote: | Originally posted by *~LiSa-LoO~*
I disagree. I think there's a difference btwn a guy actually wanting to sleep with a girl friend and a guy saying "ya, I'd sleep with her if she wanted to". I don't think that all guys actively desire to sleep with their girl friends. But I think they probably all would sleep with them if the girl wanted to.
Though, obviously I'm a girl and I can't say for sure. lol |
I've had too many guy friends eventually shut me out of their lives after I let them know it wasn't gonna happen (either a relationship or sex) for me to believe otherwise.
(and I've had enough guys tell me this themselves). |
|
|
| Jennifer_P_ |
Gay Men for Best friends FTW!
(perfect balance - no sexual tension) |
|
|
| Intangible |
| quote: | Originally posted by Jennifer_P_
I've had too many guy friends eventually shut me out of their lives after I let them know it wasn't gonna happen (either a relationship or sex) for me to believe otherwise.
|
Yup
Nothing sucks more than a guy ending what you thought was a great 'friendship' because he realizes you arent ever going to sleep with him or date him. |
|
|
| *~LiSa-LoO~* |
| quote: | Originally posted by Jennifer_P_
I've had too many guy friends eventually shut me out of their lives after I let them know it wasn't gonna happen (either a relationship or sex) for me to believe otherwise.
(and I've had enough guys tell me this themselves). |
I see from your experiences why you would believe that. But I still believe otherwise. I've had guy friends who have made advances and I've declined and I'm still friends with them. And I've had guys say both to me. Some will say that guys only want to sleep with their girl friends, but then others will sat that they have girl friends who they don't want to sleep with and that they're not friends with girls just b/c they want to have sex with them.
I actually just asked a guy right now b/c I don't believe that all guys want to sleep with all of their girl friends. He said that if a guy is single he'd probably want to sleep with some of his girl friends, but he's not friends with them just b/c he wants to sleep with them. He said some guys are friends with girls just b/c he thinks she's cool and doesn't have sexual feelings towards them.
I'm not saying that it doesn't happen more often than not, but I definitely believe that not ALL guys are friends with girls just b/c they want to bang them. |
|
|
| barbina |
See I don't believe that theory at all. I have completely platonic relationships with girls of the straight and gay variety. I don't mind sleeping with my friends, but its not the basis of our relationships - ever.
I also have amazing friendships with guys who I know would never sleep with me, and I with them. Its not about attraction or sexuality, but its levels of friendship.
But of course.. there are always the select few ..
Maybe I just have great friends who understand the meanings of friendship and sex. |
|
|
| Jennifer_P_ |
| quote: | Originally posted by *~LiSa-LoO~*
I'm not saying that it doesn't happen more often than not, but I definitely believe that not ALL guys are friends with girls just b/c they want to bang them. |
The thing is - close boy/girl friendships are the exception rather than the norm. But I totally realize it's possible - like I mentioned earlier - my closest friend is a guy... |
|
|
| barbina |
| quote: | Originally posted by Jennifer_P_
The thing is - close boy/girl friendships are the exception rather than the rule. |
lol no offense Jen, you know I adore you .. but that's just ridiculous.
Just because its an old social stigma it doesn't mean its true.
You yourself have proved it wrong. |
|
|
| *~LiSa-LoO~* |
| quote: | Originally posted by barbina
See I don't believe that theory at all. I have completely platonic relationships with girls of the straight and gay variety. I don't mind sleeping with my friends, but its not the basis of our relationships - ever.
I also have amazing friendships with guys who I know would never sleep with me, and I with them. Its not about attraction or sexuality, but its levels of friendship.
But of course.. there are always the select few ..
Maybe I just have great friends who understand the meanings of friendship and sex. |
I agree with you completely.
| quote: | Originally posted by Jennifer_P_
The thing is - close boy/girl friendships are the exception rather than the rule. But I totally realize it's possible - like I mentioned earlier - my closest friend is a guy... |
This I would agree with. I think that boy/girl friendships (not even close relationships necessarily) with no sexual desire is the exception. But I think it's more than just .01% lol I think it's a LOT higher than that. |
|
|
| Jennifer_P_ |
| quote: | Originally posted by barbina
lol no offense Jen, you know I adore you .. but that's just ridiculous.
Just because its an old social stigma it doesn't mean its true.
You yourself have proved it wrong. |
and I love you too baby ;) but... the friendship I have with "him" is on a level that I have never been able to duplicate with another guy.
I can have male friends who are more like acquaintances - whom I really haven't thought much about whether or not they wanted to bang me lol... and I have male friends who are already attatched who I doubt are looking for more....
But super super close? it hasn't happened for me more than once out of a lot of tries in my 30 years. I like having guys as friends - I've tried and failed so many times :( |
|
|
| ChemEnhanced |
| Even if a guy never says anything or acts on it...in the back of their head they are always hoping. |
|
|
|
|
